The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
07/23/09
Good job conveying the generation gap. I thought it was interesting the teen had an 80s song on her cell. Good work.
07/23/09
Fun to make the comparisons between generations. Good job. Sabrina seems like a mature teen with a good relationship with her parents -- a breath of fresh air!

The past tense-present tense style of writing switched back and forth through out the story which was distracting. Noticed a couple of POV shifts also.