The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
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Date
07/17/09
Interesting conversation between two old friends. I liked the names you gave everyone-made this story a fun read.
An enjoyable read with fun characters.
07/20/09
Lovely storytelling with charming characters. And I agree -- great names.

I'd like to read a rewrite of this piece with an eye toward simplifying the sentences. I think it would bring the language into the same tone of simplicity that is found in the charming and rustic storyline.

Your writing is so rich in imagery.
Love these two old codgers. I wondered if they were going to find a couple of sweethearts after their diversion down Lover's Lane but I'm glad they decided to go "tidy" up their own gardens. A very entertaining and well written story.
07/21/09
There are some great little episodes here, well articulated and authentic sounding. But I felt a little let down by the ending and found myself wondering what the point of the story was. Maybe there simply isn't one or perhaps I missed it. But there you have it.
I'm sorry there was never a Lover's Lane near where I grew up - sounds like I missed out on a bit of larking around. (Interpret that as you will!)
07/21/09
What a great story and a fun read! I know you must have had a good time writing this one! I enjoyed it and I hope the judges enjoy it enough to place you high in the tallies. Very good job!!!
07/22/09
You have a lot of good descriptions and visual imagery.