Home Tour About Read What's New Help Join Faith
My Account Login

Get Our Devotional             Win Publishing Package             Detailed Navigation

The HOME for Christian writers! The Home for Christian Writers!
The Official Writing Challenge



how it works
submission rules
guidelines for
choosing a level


submit your entry
read current entries
read past entries
challenge winners

Our Daily Devotional HERE
Place it on your site or
receive it daily by email.



how it works   Submit

Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: Summer (the season) (07/09/09)

TITLE: The Lofty Citadel
By mick dawson


The Lofty Citadel

The heat of the Nusallean air still stifled Dathen, even though the sun had set for six turns of the glass. He peered skyward, marveling at how the stars shone in perfect clarity, but then they always had done on summer evenings. Some twinkled through the wispy clouds, which slowly drifted aside like a veil. As they moved, they revealed the full moon. He looked around himself at the hills and surrounding bush, all bathed in grey light.

A breeze rippled his clothing, doing nothing to cool him. It was a warm draft; causing beads of perspiration to rivulet down his chest, soaking into his tunic, but the summer heat did have its advantages. He had never been this far from his cliff-top home before. The hot air gusted upward from the ground; lifting him whenever he hovered over any undulation. It seemed that if he adhered to the hills, there would be sufficient updrafts for him to reach his goal. His harness rattled, while his “air sail,” glided ever northward.

He should have been exhilarated; no man had ever tamed the skies before. Dathen sucked in a deep breath. The goal of finding Nilapa far outstripped any elation he would have felt for being the first man to fly.

His eyes furrowed at his destination, a broad but lofty column of rock rose among others. As he angled closer, he saw yellow lights, some he was certain were windows, while others were naked flames. Walls began to emerge as silhouettes, crested by irregularly angled roofs; all were signs that he had found the fortress he sought. He fumed inwardly at the fortress. It was a haven for the bandits that had abducted the woman he loved.

Movement caught his eye at the edge of the column. He angled higher for the clouds, then gently soared above the edge of the bluff. Two donkeys were shackled to a capstan wheel turning it in their monotonous, circular trek.

The wheel creaked, as a sturdy rope tightened. His eyes fell to the lower side of the rock face to see several men standing inside a wooden cage.

He kicked up, suddenly angling the pointed nose of his air sail for the donkeys. His hands tightened on the triggers of the tubes mounted on the harness. A hiss ensued as he stared grimly, circling the beasts, waiting for the sleeping darts to take effect.

They faltered, legs buckled, then they collapsed, ceasing on any further progress.

He glanced downward, relieved that the cage supporting the men was suspended, far from the ground.

He angled sharply, veering down for the unlit gardens to the side of the keep, then suddenly pulled up, allowing him to alight softly on the lawn. Dathen crouched in the shadow of the wall, still in his harness, listening. No voices were raised in alarm.

Good he thought, climbing out of the harness; now to find Nilapa…

The opinions expressed by authors may not necessarily reflect the opinion of FaithWriters.com.
Accept Jesus as Your Lord and Savior Right Now - CLICK HERE
JOIN US at FaithWriters for Free. Grow as a Writer and Spread the Gospel.

This article has been read 562 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Fay Ternan07/16/09
If this isn't a sample from a full book, it should be.
Josiah Kane07/17/09
This certainly has the ring of an exciting story, especially the description of flight. I must admit was somewhat confused as to when it was set, since Dathen says he was the first man to fly, yet he has pneumatic tubes firing tranqulizer darts with which to shoot down donkeys.