The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
06/12/09
Your message "Embrace today… Treasure today... Tomorrow will be too late.” is so very good! I enjoyed this tour though Grandma's house, I was wishing to read more!
This was a creative way to approach the topic. I liked the memories for the house's occupants that you "squeezed" out of your imagination
06/15/09
Just right! You captured the look and feel of this "elderly" home...changing it from a scary place into one of love and comfort. Well done!
06/15/09
This was so heavy with atmosphere...very nicely written. Well done!
Really enjoyed the details of the story. I could picture the happenings between the nine kids....nicely done.
06/15/09
You've created a spooky, mysterious atmosphere with the descriptions of the setting and the MC's feelings. I really want her and Ben to keep Grandma's house and start their own family there! It is a bit rough in places, like you mentioned some missing words, and in places the flow doesn't seem really smooth. Have you tried reading your stories out loud to see how they sound? That will also help you find the missing words. ;) I enjoyed the story and the idea, and you are very much on topic with this piece! You touched me emotionally, and that is a BIG plus for a writer!
06/17/09
Why is it we wives/sisters/daughters get to do some of the tough stuff? Oh yes, that's right...we're helpmates.
Your MC did her thing and learned. God inspires us when we step forth in courage.
Interesting story. well told.
Mona
06/18/09
Oh Kar - this was touching, deep and tugged insistently at my heart strings. I found the opening paragraph, although your word choices were perfect and very artful, almost too much for my senses. Does that make sense (no pun intended)? But the lesson you brought out was spot on and the mood fit well. Good entry.