The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 515 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
05/28/09
What a tragic loss but what a breath taking gain when we let Christ in!

Your story traveled the time frame well for a word limit. Your descriptions paint a believable story.
05/28/09
The title and the first half of this really grabbed me--quite a good job of showing, not telling.

The second half fizzled a bit--the dialogue didn't seem as realistic, and it almost read like a blurb for the book series.

Nice ending, and very good characterization.
05/29/09
You did a great job making your MC's character come alive, along with that of her parents. I think what happened is you hurried up your ending because you were reaching your word count. (I've been there numerous of times.) Possibly, if a little less was said about the book, it might have flowed a little better. I really liked the message of hope this sends to those who are struggling with "chronic darkness." Hopefully, they'll read the book as well.
Nice job on topic. Good story. Well done.