The Official Writing Challenge
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Your MC reminds me in part of Sandra Bullock character as Gracie Hart in “Miss Congeniality” But this time she’s on Percocet and has an excuse for letting her soft side sneak in from time to time. Really liked this revealing line especially: “I give serious thought to quelling these tears. Quelling is actually a lovely word. Fortitude seems to be lacking, though. Fortitude is a powerful word. Alas, I have no fortitude to quell anything. So I go with it. I am the tears.”

Actually, I know someone exactly like this. She just turned 17 and you’ve captured her feisty, smart but vulnerable personality perfectly. There were many subtle hints to the theme through out which I thought very clever, creative and unique.
Great take on the topic...very creative. Well done.
05/02/09
Loren beat me to it. That section on fortitude and quelling was sensational. I really enjoyed this story but its wonderfully conflicting throughts and expressions. So very human and, dare I say it, female. One minor quibble would be that I thought your closing line was a little weak. Thanks.
This is so enjoyable! I was cringing at the MC and wondering what I said when I was sedated last. Good job.
05/03/09
I love this girl's cheeky personality. And so much comes out between the lines of what they don't say to each other! Wonderful, brilliant dialogue.
05/04/09
Hilarious and revealing in a cringing sort of way! Yes, you have it right--sedated nervous people say things they would regret later. The conflict here between her "tough" exterior and her "vulnerable" interior is wonderful. Some terrific writing.
What a fun read! Love the dialogue, and I can remember in my former nursing days tending to sedated people who said such things, and worse.

Kudos for this well-written piece.
05/04/09
Hee-hee! What a fun and funny piece! :D This really is excellent writing, and I especially enjoyed the "quelling" part and this bit of dialogue,too:

“I’m sure many weak and feeble-minded women swoon when they meet, you, Doctor. But it takes more than a lab jacket and a good set of horse teeth to impress me.” I’m momentarily confused. Did I say that out loud?

“Swooning women are a cross I must bear,” he says. “And I’ll let my parents know the orthodontia was not in vain.”

Thanks for the good laugh!
05/04/09
I like the title. Clever.
And I love this line - I don’t like the fact that this man is a male. Clever, again!

And, I have to admit... I really did feel a bit swoony over the Doc. :)
Your talent shines here in the development of this feisty character. I fell in love with her and the doctor.
05/04/09
Absolutely charming! I agree with Myrna on the part about the swooning etc. Both the MC's initial confusion as to whether she thought or actually said that, and also the doctor's response. Enjoyable all the way through. Thanks!
05/04/09
Your creativity each week amazes me. Another excellent story.
Hilarious! I loved every bit of it! Can't elaborate on anything anyone said...
05/04/09
This was so good, hee hee! I loved it!
This was a fun read. Love the open and honesty of the MC. Like her turn of interest as well. Good job.
05/06/09
Was your MC sedated? I thought it was just me. Great story, loved this.
05/06/09
Sigh - the way that you capture her voice is magnificent. Wait, did I say that out loud? Yes, yes I did. And I meant it. Magnificent and wonderful. This had me laughing and reading again. And then laughing again. Masterful use of the topic - who knew about that whole bone/muscle thing??? Well, other than you. Excellent piece. Seriously.
There is that famous Lisa voice that I love. You manage to give it to all your characters, and it's what makes the reader able to relate to your writing. I loved her observations of the man (his teeth and his hairy hand). You always add just the right amount of humor to every piece you write. Did I ever mention that I'm a fan? :)