The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 928 times
Member Comments
Wonderful lesson.
A good example of a Godly wife. Gentle, quiet, but not afraid to speak her mind when the right time comes. Nice writing.
Your descriptions were vivid from the drag of his tired routine to their honest conversation at the table. Good job.
I loved your descriptions in this story of a marriage that was almost ending and got a new beginning.
I really liked the authentic, uncomfortable atmosphere this had, and the dialogue felt real, too. The last line was perfect!
So tender and sweet! I love that he still found her beautiful, and that you didn't write him as entirely despicable.

I think I'd have ended it two sentences earlier.

Her explanation was heartbreakingly gracious...I loved it.
This is so beautiful and so true-to-life. I'm so glad the couple finally had the heart-to-heart discussion they'd probably needed to have for years! Well done.
Excellent message. The dialog and pacing really moved this story along and I loved that line: "I hoped eventually you’d get tired of the cold, lonely meals and you’d come home and eat with me."--ouch
This was a really good piece. I found myself stretching toward the end, anxious to see what exactly was going to unfold in this dramatic scene- great writing.
There's something about this line: “Something wrong with your dinner?”, that I find very real.

I like the interaction between the husband and wife, and I like the ending. Well done.
Reading this as a husband really brings home the fact that there are a lot of us husbands who need to recognize the gentle Godliness in our wives. If possible, I apologise for us all.
The story is very real sounding. Many marriage fall away and all it takes to mend them is making time for each other
What a great message here. Very well done!
I really like this. You brought the characters to life. Gentleness is something God has really been speaking to me about in my marriage. Thank you for this lesson.
This was a great read. I especially liked your descriptions in the 2nd paragraph:
He walked to the microwave with the plate and pressed the worn reheat dinner plate button.

He chewed slowly, but the taste of guilt masked the meat’s flavor.

This story really made me think about marriage and how unfair it can sometimes be. Good writing!
I enjoyed your story, and the marriage lessons contained in it. I'm glad for the ray of hope with which you ended the story. It could greatly encourage any couple experiencing a similar thing.
Wow, this woman is a true example of Christ's grace. The dialogue is very realistic.

I would make one word change on the following sentence: “But I don’t deserve to be stood up every night, either.” I would change 'But' to 'And'--I think it more accurately reflects what she is trying to convey.

Really good descriptions in this single scene. Very good writing.
I don't see a thing to red ink, this is really good. Its a constant struggle for me to learn to "tell, not show" the stories the way you do.
Beautiful story and a reminder to us all about where our priorities should be.
Wow, this was so good. Great lesson for us all to know and well written.
Congratulations on your EC, Kristen. So glad to have you back. :)
Beautifully told through the eyes and heart of a loving woman. For me, it was not dinner waiting, but rather my wife standing at the door, welcoming me home with her wonderful smile. Congratulations and well deserved - Loren
CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR EC!! This was a very moving, well-written piece! :)
I was gripped by your vivid writing. You did a great job here! Congratulations on your well-deserved placement, Kristen!
Congratulations! Nice and not too didactic. This would be great for a Sunday School paper.
We should all learn how to be more gracious. This is where a person reaps and faints not.
At first I feared the worst. I thought he had been cheating on her every night. I'm so glad that this had a happy ending. This guy really didn't deserve a wife this good. I think all men can take something valuable from this piece.