The Official Writing Challenge
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12/06/08
I had to laugh at the "bounce on the bed rattling my full bladder." :) What a Christmas gift for her. Your title is perfect for this heart-warming story!
12/08/08
I love the way this started - I can so relate! I also like the husband - I want presents! That made me grin. Her surprise took me by surprise. Great story!
12/09/08
Yeah, I didn't have any expectation about what she would find. Well done!
12/09/08
I was very taken with the phrase "A smile crept in with her...". Gorgeous!
12/09/08
Sweet story. You had my emotions a-rolling, from laughing at her feeble attempts to stay in bed, to the mystery of her husband's behaviour to the joy at seeing her brother. Nice, nice job.
12/10/08
Lovely and heartwarming. I was right there in the kitchen, with her. You've written this well and what a nice surprise for your narrator. Good job!
12/10/08
Oh, what a happy surprise! Love this ending and what mom can possibly get away with sleeping in on Christmas morning!? Lovely story.
This is really heartwarming on so many levels. As a mom - it warms my heart to remember those moments of children so anxious on Christmas morning. As a wife - it warms my heart that the husband would be so thoughtful. And as a sister, it is wonderful to share in your mc's suprise. :)
12/11/08
Oooh, I could feel the warmth of the little girl cuddling up with me...very sweet story with good imagery. Well done.
05/14/09
its so great to read about soldiers coming back. war is so dangerous... it can make a person feel bad about the wonderful, every day moments, like the ones in the beggining of your story.