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Santa, I’ve a bone to pick
A grave and sober case
The way I have been treated is
An absolute disgrace
I know about the lists compiled
And labels you employ
Attaching words like good and bad
To every girl and boy
The harvest for behaviour
Is seen on Christmas Day
In gifts beneath the Christmas tree
That come from Santa’s sleigh
The year I’d like to question
Was 1992
The paltry pile before me was
The saddest thing to view
It seems you were not watching
Those times that I was kind
To all my acts of helpfulness
It seems that you were blind
I know for sure that other kids
Behaved far worse than me
And yet you left them choicest gifts
This seems a travesty
The problem is that good and bad
Are open to debate
The terms are so subjective that
Confusion they create
A checklist of behaviour
With boxes you could tick
A fair evaluation
Would surely do the trick
I feel that I must warn you
Of rumours that I've heard
They say that you're not real
I find that most absurd!
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