The Official Writing Challenge
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11/15/08
Oh my. I'm caught between feeling very, very sorry for the family, and chuckling over the mom's instance on getting the job done!

I was pretty sure I had figured it out, but had to look up the name McMahon to make sure. Maybe something about a check at the end. (Unless I missed something about a check. Which is entirely possible! :))
11/15/08
It took me a minute to figure it out, but once I got it you had me chuckling out loud! Great story, a lot of fun, and strangely fitting. Well done.
I'd never thought of recruiting help with the cards before...good idea. I was wondering how this would end, and loved how it did :) Delightful.
It really bothered me that they didn't answer the doorbell! The ending resolved that issue for me, however. How funny! I like your little aside (told you it doesn't ring much)!
Very cute. You had me smiling at the neurotic mother, her reluctant family, and of course, who the people at the door were. Great job!
11/18/08
Liked this story, mysterious opening, good characterizations and made me giggle. If I could suggest something (gulp, makes me nervous to be handing out advice to YOU!) tell me what the MC is thinking when the doorbell's ringing - is she imagining who it is, is she afraid of her mom, what's going on??? Build the suspense, then the ending will be even funnier. OK, nuff said. Good story.
11/19/08
Wow... consequences to our actions.. and to think they will never know what they missed that day. Good idea for the story. The mom was lovable but needs a little therapy imho~!
11/19/08
Oh man. What an ending. LOL. Too funny. Gotta love that drill sargent of a mom:) Funny... But of course, what they don't know can't possibly hurt them:)
Unique take. :) I couldn't relate to your characters since getting cards out isn't that big of a chore at our house. lol
11/19/08
Oh my--that poor family! Wish I could form an assembly line with our cards--instead, I do them myself--over several weeks so I don't have to deal with it at once-lol!
: ) Talk about getting one's priorities wrong. And I doubt there will ever be any second chances on this one.
Oh wow, that would probably happen to *me*. The ending made me chuckle out loud. Creative and well done.
11/19/08
Nothing I can think of to add, this was really funny, and I totally enjoyed it.
I love the twist at the end! Luckily for mom, they'll never know who was knocking. Your characters are fun and easy to get to know; I like that they all pitched in even tho they complained.
11/20/08
Hilarious! Great twist, there. :)
11/20/08
LOL, NEVER would have thought of that twist...NEVER! Love it!
I was so mad at your obsessive mother by the time I finished, I was glad she missed the grand prize...almost. Great twist!