The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
11/08/08
This story is so cute. I remember pulling out my kid's thumbs from their mouths. It is great fun. I love the way you worked out the characters. Nice job!
11/10/08
Loved this, I laughed out loud at the revelation of what he did with the light. Good job!
I love the tone of this - from a kid's perspective. Good job.
This is really cute. I could just see every one on the bus hanging on to her every word. I like the thumb sucking and popping. Nicely done!
11/11/08
Very cute story! You do an excellent job of describing the story from a child's perspective.
11/12/08
Wonderful POV, and delightful story and descriptions. Felt like I was right there on the bus with them.
You really captured children's words, expressions, and actions :)