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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: Snap (09/04/08)

TITLE: Snappy Rat's Final Snap
By Gerald Shuler
09/11/08


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The traps were laid with cheese in place meant to eradicate the race
of all the rats infesting streets. They think it theirs; it's their retreat.
But soon, so soon they'll all be gone... falling prey to where they're drawn.
They'll all fall prey; no other way. They'll never see another day.

Unknown to man but praised by rats a hero rose to route the traps;
a youthful rat, unappealing, with a knack for cheese trap stealing.
With blinding speed he rushed right in to steal the cheese, then leave again.
He'd rush the cheese and then he'd leave, the trap would snap, no more to grieve.

Snappy Rat, sworn nemesis of the trap setting supremacists,
would nightly run his faithful rounds throughout the streets where rats abound.
Snappy's motto, "Snap That Trap", rang out as every cheese trap snapped.
"Snap That Trap", then comes the snap as growing crowds of rats all clap.

As fate would have, his daring deeds propelled his fame to other breeds,
namely a mouse, a movie star, in fact, she was a superstar.
She was determined to take a trip and meet the rat who could skip
with stealthy footsteps any spring designed to catch the rat trap king.

Now, something you must understand: Snappy Rat had never planned
to fall in love or even date... his life was sealed by darker fate.
But when his eyes first fell on hers fate was changed; there were no cures.
Relinquishing his honored call he sought to please the mouse... that's all.

The mouse saw clearly she must go but first she must let Snappy know.
Poor Snappy took it much too hard. Heartbroken, he chose to discard
love altogether. Snappy knew there was but one thing he could do.
He'd let her go, no fuss, no scene. He'd watch her boarding flight eighteen.

She scampered across the crowded room, quite unaware of pending doom
until she saw the hunk of cheese that now called her name on scented breeze.
A trap, of course, but she felt bound, hypnotized by the prize she'd found.
Flight now forgotten, all she knew was step by step the cheese scent grew.

In horror, Snappy watched it all, no way to help from 'cross the hall.
No way to help? No, let this be his final snap trap victory.
The rat took out with blinding speed while calling out his famous creed.
"Snap that trap" His words rang out. Faster, faster, he could have no doubt.

The trap was far too far away but Snappy ran hard anyway,
determined to push the mouse aside,. But no more speed could be applied.
Tears flowed down the hero's cheek; too far away, completely weak,
he watched as his love neared the cheese and he could only pant and wheeze.

"Forget my creed," Snappy cried, "Lord God of Creation, forgive my pride.
Help me do what I can't do." Something in Snappy snapped, it's true.
His speed increased, the trap drew near as watching rats began to cheer
and his dear love saw him rush by. He'd made it, now to do or die.

The trap was huge, as was the bait, but Snappy did not hesitate.
He hit the cheese with all his might but it stayed in place, holding tight.
Surprised, and slowed, Snappy froze as that horrid trap began to close.
Oh, poor Snappy, he leaped too slow to miss the trap spring's crushing blow.

Now the tale is ever sung of how the trap had finally sprung
Leaving a hero in its wake that inspires young rats to break
Snappy's record. Oh don't be sad. This tale would never end that bad.
Perhaps I really shouldn't fail to say the trap only hit his tail.


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This article has been read 983 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Charla Diehl 09/11/08
You certainly captured the topic with this poem. Bet you had a lot of smiles writing it. Cute, fun, enjoyable, creative are just a few ways I'd describe this poem.
Leah Nichols 09/12/08
Very cute! An animal love story? Nice job!
Beth LaBuff 09/12/08
Ha! Love your ending (that would be the tail ending). What fun. Great rhymes and meter here.
Lynda Schultz 09/13/08
Three cheers for our hero: love for all and all for love. Well done.
Joanne Sher 09/14/08
Loads of fun and wonderfully done. Excellent use of internal rhyme.
Kristen Hester09/16/08
I really enjoyed this story and I'm so glad the trap only got his tail. I hope the love story also ends well. You really made me care for these rodents. That's good writing since I don't usually care for rats. Yikes!
Shelley Ledfors 09/16/08
Absolutely charming. I was right there with Snappy. I'm glad it ended well!
Celeste Ammirata09/17/08
Oh, this is fun! Very cute, and I love the message. With God all things are possible. Great job.
LauraLee Shaw09/17/08
Wowzer, I read it aloud and got tongue-tied. Awesome, creative piece of work!
Joy Faire Stewart09/17/08
I couldn't believe I was cheering for a rat, but then he wasn't just any rat, it was Snappy. Love the humor, especially the stanza about "cheese scent." And the ending is perfect.
Kristi Peifer09/17/08
Cute! Reminiscent of Dr. Seuss, yet unique!
Karlene Jacobsen 09/17/08
This was great! (smiling) I found myself picking up pace as I read towards the end when Snappy raced to save his love.
T. F. Chezum09/17/08
Very fun read ... great job. I really like the humor.
Sharlyn Guthrie09/17/08
I enjoyed this, but children would love it, too, expecially with all the alliterations. Excellent!
Joshua Janoski09/17/08
What a fun story. Catchy rhythm too. I was holding my breath at the end, and I was sure that Snappy was a goner. So glad it only caught his tail. :)

It's writing like this that I can only hope to someday achieve. Creative and well written.