The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
09/04/08
I love how you tied (literally) the cross into your story. Great message. Well done.
09/06/08
Wonderful storytelling with very realistic characterization. The interior monologue, especially, was exceptionally good. Very well written.
This is fantastic. Well done.
Good, tight writing that also addresses an important subject. Believable dialog, too. Very well done.
I love the believable voice in this entry. I, too, love the image of the cross necklance in the beginning and end. Wonderful touch and very symbolic. This is wonderful for this topic and very, very powerful. Love it!
09/08/08
What an inspirational story...great dialogue. Well done!
09/08/08
Wow, what a great story here. The reality of this type of situation is what makes it so believabe. The diaglog was right on. Great job!
09/08/08
Very believable voice - you choked me up when the youth group gathered around her, and then again when they surrounded Jaimee. I love the imagery of the tangled cross, and the "free" cross. Just wonderful!
What a wonderful piece. Telling the truth did free her, because it lead her back to the youth group, where she found acceptance. Were that all youth groups were like that... Kudos on a well written, believable piece.
09/08/08
Very moving! I liked the necklace being tangled and then free. Great story!
09/08/08
Very, very well-written, and quite realistic, both the situation and the narrator's voice. This is an excellent story!
I like this story. The contrast between the truth-teller and the secret-keeper was very realistic. I'm glad it ended on a positive, hopeful note.
09/08/08
The voice of this is very good--it sounds just like a teenager. And the topic is, unfortunately, very relevant.

The only part I question is the use of roly-poly. I know the picture you were trying to get across, but that term almost seems to give a lightness to a very serious piece. (I always smile when I read or hear "roly-poly.")

Powerful message...this would be great for youth groups. Nice job.
09/08/08
This sad/tragic story is written so well. My heart goes out to your MC. Looking forward to the day when "all will be made right."
So glad Sandy had a "youth group" to go to, so many youth don't. Glad she was made aware that she was not alone - such an important fear for teens. :)
I enjoyed the way the cross was woven through story. Also, excellent job of showing that results of doing what is right, isn't always instantaneous.
09/09/08
I love the line "Thank you, that even knowing how much it may cost her, she has dared to tell the truth." I feel the truth setting all the youth free at the end. Doubly excellent!
WOW! This is wonderful! And excelently writtes!