The Official Writing Challenge
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I enjoyed this charming allegory. You really captured the faithfulness and wistful longing of the "dog" waiting patiently for its "master."
08/29/08
Oh my, this story simply broke my heart! Wonderful use of repetition...I'm not a dog person at ALL, but I totally choked up at this. Superb writing.
08/30/08
Beautiful story! Held my attention to the end. Great descriptions! Made my eyes tear up. Our Master will return too because He said He will. Very nicely done.
Wonderful writing, wonderful story...loved everything about it!
08/31/08
Perfect illustration of the topic, and wonderfully done. I was releived when the Master returned.
08/31/08
I'm so glad that we see the title next to the critique box because, otherwise, I forget them. This title is perfect as Jesus reminds us to watch for Him, to EXPECT him. I need to be more like this dog, more consistently trusting of my Master's perfect loyalty to me.
The use of "master" over and over did distract me a bit, but I can also see why it is necessary in this. ;)
I'm a bit of a softy when it comes to dogs, and I was really afraid the master wasn't coming home this time. I wasn't disappointed by the ending. A well told story!
This brought tears to my eyes. I have several dogs, and I love them to pieces. I was terrified that the master wouldn't return, and the dog would be heartbroken. What a relief! :) Great writing.
09/01/08
I absolutely loved this...fantastic writing.
Very good. I like the way you got us into the dog's head!
09/02/08
Wonderful subject for this topic. I love this faithful pet. I could take a few lessons from him on patience. I was sure it was going to end badly for him, but I shouldn't have been - after all, the master always returns. :) Cat
I truly loved this story. I have often wondered what went through my dog's head when we are gone. Now I know :) I really felt the drama as it developed and could see the yard under patrol. I am so glad the master returned!
09/03/08
This is wonderful! I feel so sad for the doggie. Of course canines are the epitome of patience; always waiting and watching for us to pay attention to them. The repeated pattern of thought is perfect for this entry. Concise and detailed writing, Hoomi.
09/03/08
Superb piece of writing! You completely drew me in, and I'm not really a dog person at all! I like the open ending....allows the reader to draw their own conclusion.
I had to read this to my husband. The little dog's situation was a heartbreaker and then to realize it's a reminder of the coming of Christ, perfect...one of my favorites this week.
I never really thought about our animals and how patiently they wait for our return every time we leave them for a while. This was a very clever way of demonstrating this week's topic. Great job with this one! :)
09/04/08
Wowzer, this is outstanding in every way. Your writing skills amaze me.