The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
07/11/05
A very intresting style, although I have to admit some if it was hard to read. I'm assuming it's because of the person not speaking in their native tounge. It takes careful reading to not miss anything in this nice story.
07/11/05
Difficult to read without paragraph breaks. Story was also a little difficult to follow.
07/11/05
It's a sweet story. If you join the message boards you may be able to find someone to help you with your English for each challenge.
07/12/05
I liked your story very much. I thought it was amazing too. Beautiful thoughts that struggled through the language barrier. I think it would be great if someone could help you along with the English version. I also think that their are computor programs that can convert your story's from your natural language into English. That would help, although I like a little evidence of your language too. God bless, littlelight
07/13/05
A great effort from someone who I suspect does not have English as their first language. However, I am a little confused about the ending.
07/13/05
Very nice! Keep on writing.
07/14/05
I like the contrast, at the end, with the rain knocking at the window where the two people sat and talked. Thanks for posting this entry. It is lovely.
07/14/05
Oh - meant to say about the last line - I like the way it ties in with the beginning too. The way that winter comes not immediately in Russia, but torments by pouring rain on the heads of the round-shouldered people. (Sorry - don't have it in front of me to quote from.) Again - well done.

Just a hint. How about you get someone to proofread for you. Your English is excellent. Maybe you're a fluent English speaker intending to sound like two non-native English speakers. But it does make it a little bit harder to read. If it were more accurate with grammar, it would read more easily. And it would be an excellent activity for you if English isn't your first language. Believe me - I've done enough of that in another language myself :-)
"I saw it in my dream - I have never been on the sea beach." Made chills go down my spine! A lovely story line, both sweet and sad.
07/15/05
At first the language made it difficult to read. I couldn't decide if the writer was struggling in a second language or was working a very good dialect piece. But as I read on the dialect gave the piece a very distinct flavor. I don't know if it was intentional or not, but it added some spice to an interesting story. Very nice!