The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
08/07/08
Very intense, especially the first part. It seemed to lose a bit of its intensity once you switched to the husband's POV - but it could be me. I was definitely engaged.
08/07/08
I enjoyed your entry, but I'm confused on the ending. Why was the cops outside of the house?
Your character was very real--showing depression in so many ways. I hated the choice she made, but that's good realistic writing.
08/11/08
Oooooooooooooooh! What a moment might cost. Makes me want to watch how my voice sounds when I'm stressed. I hope I never make a loved one feel put off when I'm really concerned!!!!!!!!!

Good writing. It certainly leaves the reader to put in the final details, but gives enough info to be able to do so. Reluctantly. That makes it a good story.
08/12/08
Wow... our attitudes mean so much to our loved ones.

I was a little confused about the ending as well at first.. but I got it. Maybe a bigger separation or letting us know it was later in the day or something would make it clearer.

But.. yeah.. wow. Great writing and important lesson. Tragic.
Your descriptions were very vivid. I could picture myself sitting next to the woman as she dangled her legs over the edge of the bridge.

I understood the ending, but it did leave me with a couple unanswered questions. This didn't detract from the story though.

I appreciate you sharing your writing talent with all of us.