The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
06/05/08
Yikes, that ending sure took me by surprise! great job with juxtaposing the peaceful tour of the home with the revelation of that last paragraph.
06/09/08
Oooh, good twist at the end. I didn't see that one coming! You had such neat memories and descriptions going here, the ending was good though, it added a whole new layer to this! ^_^
06/09/08
Oooh, not the ending I was expecting at all!! Great twist! Good descriptions throughout; nice job overlaying the sad & decaying present with the warm & beautiful memories of past.
I could see the house as you described it. I felt the difference of the mode, but the ending was a surprise. I like those kind of endings.
Your descriptive detail made the story come alive. The twist at the end was "wow"! Great writing.
Wow I loved your descriptions and could feel your emotions. The ending was very well done and surprising.
Norms
I like how the gate opened to welcome her home!

I was confused that there would be light in an abandoned house, but you built the suspense and explained it with the angel. Good work!
06/11/08
Absolutely phenomenal descriptions. Wow. And then end took me by surprise. Lovely.
06/11/08
Sometimes the descriptions are as fun to read as the story line itself. That was true in this story. Your descriptions were colorful and detailed. Also, you did a fantastic job showing your emotions. Well done!
06/12/08
Very well written! I like the detailed description throughout the story, building up emotions and suspense. The angelic visit gives a perfect ending to the story with peaceful assurance that calms the soul.