The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
05/22/08
Depression will get you every time! Such a wonderful, and well written story, with a real creative ending. Nicely done! Enjoyed the read.
I enjoyed this story very much. The characterization is excellent.
This was a charming and engaging tale. It's amazing how emotional our pets can be at times.
Perfect! There is nothing wrong with this tender well written entry.

I loved all of it.
05/28/08
How sweet! Dogs are so sensitve and tender, aren't they?

Here's just a tiny thing that might improve your "hook"--avoid starting with a character's age. There are better ways to reel in a reader, and it's "telling", anyway. Show us how old the boy is by his behavior and speech. What do you think?

This was very visual--I could see the poor sad dog drooping, and the precious little boy, frantic in his worry. Very well done!
I loved this story. How sweet. I have seen our dog depressed and so I know it does happen. Good job!
Awww, poor Tess was missing her Mummy. This is quite a common occurrence, and you have portrayed it really well. Good job Miss Chrissy :)
05/28/08
I really enjoyed the dialogue, it was very natural and realistic. The addition of Josh sleeping in Tess' basket was a great touch. Keep up the great work!
05/28/08
Great storytelling here - I was absolutely engaged. You did an especially good job with the emotions, and I LOVED your ending.
05/28/08
Chrissy, very good. I really liked this. Loved your descriptions. Great job!
Laury
05/28/08
Oooh, good job with the emotions/atmosphere here. I sort of figured out that Tess was missing Jenna, but then I got worried with Josh hoping that she was all right. Good job! ^_^
Your Tess was so endearing. Can I take her home with me? Great writing my FaithWriter friend.
05/28/08
As a pet lover, I can surely relate to this story. It is such a tender sweet story and so well told!
05/28/08
Excellent story of an animal suffering from something that is not fully revealed until the end, although it is hinted at early. "Jenna’s away" is the cause of the dog's depression.
05/29/08
Chrissy, I love this story. The flow of the dialogue between the father and son seemed very natural to me. Poor Tess; she's lonely. Even the dog knows that when Mom's gone, nothing is the same. I like the title, too.
Congratulations Chrissy Dear!
05/29/08
Congratulations Chrissy on placing third in your level! This is great achievement, well deserving of a celebration!
Chrissy, congratulations on placing 3rd with this wonderful story. love, Lynne
05/29/08
***Congratulations!(My dear Aunt Chrissy!) ^_^ Awesome writing! ***
05/29/08
Very good. Nobody likes missing their Mommy!
05/29/08
Contrats Chrissy! Great job and well deserved! (*.*)!
05/29/08
Way to go!!! it was a really cute story!
Congratulations on placing 14th overall with this entry, Chrissy!
Lovely and heartwarming story. Our collie Sheba used to starve herself for the first few days when we were away. I could relate to this story very well.
06/01/08
Congratulations on your 3rd place win, Chrissie. Your story is very touching. Oh yes, when Mama isn't home, nothing is right. Tess had the right idea. It is MOM who makes a home...Mom is a necessary element. Even a dog knows that. Dads and little boys/girls are for fun, but it's MOM who keeps the home fires burning...Great job! And good ending, leading the reader right up to the solution of Tess's problem...MOM!
06/05/08
Ha.. A child missing her Mommy.. :D Way to go. Congrats on third place.