The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
This is such a "real" slice of life with outstanding description. I absolutely love this story.
I love the progression of thoughts in this piece and how you reveal her feelings as she gains insight about the different relationships. Wonderful!
I liked the way you slowly revealed the day's happenings through the mother's reflections. Good to see God's word get through to her in the end.
This is just beautiful. Your images are crisp and so visual they're tactile. Your ending, also, is PERFECT. Beautiful.
Wonderful—a "quiet" story but with a powerful message.
This story was so easy to read as it unfolded line by line. I particularly loved your descriptions; especially "The darkened window above the sink reflects my shadowy face, and I stand still and stare into the past for a minute"
Beautiful piece of writing!!
Oh, I love this beautiful story and its message. Great opening paragraph and the rest flowed perfectly.
Dee, this one just left me in utter awe. Not only one of my favorites of yours, but one of my favorites here, ever.
Oh Dee! This is truly magnificent! Wow! You captured so many feelings that we all share. Wow! This is truly a great piece of writing.
Wow. You are definately a master at telling a story. I felt like I was right there watching the scenes unfold. Wonderfully written!
Ahhh... you made me cry!
I love how you compared your imagined thoughts of your husband's childhood to your own son.
I like to look at my husband sleeping too. **smile**
This is so tender and so sweet, and well, just so GOOD!
I loved reading this extremely well-written story.
Amazing. I am moved beyond the adequate words. I won't slip into bed beside my husband without remembering this...Mega BRAVO.
Beautifully done, and you clinched it all with your last sentence.
This is so lovely that I've run out of adjectives even before I start. An amazingly beautiful piece, Dee.
What a neat and fresh perspective on the topic! I'll think of this next time I'm a little miffed with my hubby!
Good job. A few too many adjectives and adverbs for my taste, but nothing that risked sinking the boat. I enjoyed these lines:

- "I stand still and stare into the past for a minute"

- "his snores are yet on the gentle side."

I liked the ending as well, with the two kisses. Very nice. Thanks for submitting it.
Ah, tenderly written. Such sweet images you protrayed for us to share with you.
This is exquisite- "Their soft texture is all that remains as a testament of his little boy face;"

Dee, this is absolutely beautiful. I love it, love it, love it. This brought tears to my eyes, and a thump in my throat. Excellent writing.
A beautifully written piece. I loved the voice, and I loved how she took the time to think about how her mother-in-law would have acted. That really showed the great care and concern that the MC had.

Thank you for sharing. It was a real pleasure to read. :)
Beautiful! I love the last lines, it fit this scene just right. I especially loved how you started out in a familiar enviroment, the kitchen. lol. Great job! ^_^
Touching, tender, authentic, relateable, .. WOW... You got me on this one. Not having sons, I have actually said the reverse to my husband..but this one hit me between the eyes. Sometimes I think .. what if she knew I had said such and such? OUCH... Got me ... in a good way... love writing that does that .. THIS WAS EXCELLENT
That was a different and tender way of approaching the subject. I like it.
Congratulations, Dee, on placing 11th in your level and 15th overall. Great job!