The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
05/08/08
Hmmm, I'm not exactly sure what happened here. I could be missing the whole picture. I thought one of the brothers had shot himself in the head, but then I was wondering how he could'v seemingly survived to be in the hospital by then. This was pretty good though, with atmosphere and all. Nice job. ^_^
05/09/08
Nice job with the atmosphere and characterization - and your descriptions are stunning. I was completely engrossed in this story.

I also am not 100% sure what happened, but this was very intriguing.

Excellent story. It was very interesting how the Lord spoke to the one who was planning to commit suicide.
05/13/08
Wowzers! This was so cool. I think I get it... Hmmm, Milton had the attempted suicide, which misfired when he heard a car crash, which was Matthew hitting a tree after a 'divine' halucination of a boy (that I am spectulating was the image of Milton as a child)....Am I close?
Regardless, I loved it. I thought it was very clever and gutsy. Well done.
Excellent writing, although I admit I missed the point. You put me right in the middle of the action. I think you should expand this. I want to know more.
05/13/08
Great story, with so much happening, but a little hard to follow. I understand that "There was a loud bang and a gunshot" was the car crash and a gunshot that missed as a result. But not sure where the boy fitted into it, unless some kind of a vision. Also needed a break of some kind between 3rd and 4th paragraphs.