The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
05/09/08
Oh, wow. This is really good. I've thought about what it would be like to be related to Jesus a couple of times. You really captured the feelings well.

My only suggestion, and it is a very, very small suggestion that has nothing to do with the story itself, would be to shorten the title a bit. :)

Great job.
05/10/08
Great job with the topic. Some powerful lines in here.
05/12/08
I really like the long title, and this very unique POV. I don't think I've ever considered what life must have been like for Jesus' siblings.

I think this would work better in past tense (just my opinion), and there are some small punctuation errors.

I enjoyed this look into James' life very much.
Loved this POV.
It really makes one stop and think.

I could identify with the feelings of James as a child.

Well Done.
05/14/08
Wow! So much going on here, all the quick shifts in time, etc. Very good, a different perspective here. Thanks for sharing this! Never thought to look at it that way. ^_^
05/14/08
Very creative take on the topic - and I LOVE seeing this from James' perspective. Nicely done.
05/14/08
Creative take on topic, a few errors with "ed" endings even in the title. I saw where you were going with the topic but it could use some smoothing out with the transitioning. A little more work and this could shine.
05/25/08
Oh! This is spectacular! Your long title inrigued me to read your entry. I was thinking, as I read your title, "Oh this is NOT a good title. It is far too long. Titles shouldn't be this length." But as I got into the story, I changed my mind. What imagination! What "reader-appeal"! You developed the story so well, and the conclusion brought tears to my eyes. Not too much is said about Jesus' siblings. So I am happy to read your well-delivered story...Helen
12/16/08
Have you ever thought about when Jesus' siblings did something they shouldn't? Jesus wouldn't tattle to his parents. He would have told his sibling what had been done wrong and try to convince the guilty one to repent to the parents. No wonder James had a hard time accepting who Jesus really was.

Good story, good POV, well done.