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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: Mother (as in maternal parent) (04/24/08)

TITLE: Mother Is Okay
By Allen Scovil
04/26/08


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Hey buddy! Come and join me for a drink? Thanks. Don't mind if I talk with you about something, do you? Great. Miss, another beer here! Don't worry; it's on me.

Oh no, I just have to get something for my mother on Sunday.

That's right; Mother's Day, and I'm trying to figure out what to get her.

Hm? Actually, that's why I'm in here, nursing this beer. I always get depressed about this kind of stuff. Don't get me wrong; I like my mother, admire her even. Listen, she's ninety-one and still able to look after herself.

Yeah. Mike -- that's my older brother -- he set her up in her own apartment, you know, in the seniors' development over on Dundas.

Right, that one. It's really great. She gets to mix with the other seniors whenever she wants, and she can shop in the mall right next to the complex.

The problem? I don't love her.

Yeah, I know; heresy. That's why I get depressed. They say, 'You ain't human if you don't love your mother.' But you gotta see, I don't feel any bond, you know what I mean, the kind that says 'she's the greatest Mom on the planet,' the way some guys I know go on. Of course she never was the huggy-kissy sort -- too straight-laced for that.

Oh sure, I visit her regularly, tell her what I've been up to, listen to what she has to say, but that's it.

Seriously. I'm what they call cordial; warm, friendly; no love. I've seen a shrink about it now and then, but they're no help. I mean, if they can't medicate you for something, they don't know what to do with you.

My dad? Well, he's been dead now coming on twenty-five years, and I definitely wasn't close to him either -- workaholic, you know. Worked himself straight into a heart attack, ha ha.

You think? Yeah, I suppose I could be taking after my old man. It fits the pattern, doesn't it -- which is pretty thin comfort for a twice-divorced loner like me.

Ha ha. Nope; couldn't bond with them either. Hey, Miss? Two more beers here please!

Now, where was I? Oh yeah; loner. To be honest, I've pretty well given up trying to make friends any more; it's not worth the trouble. After all, my last best friend was this runty kid I knew back in grade five.

Well, I do keep trying now and again, but the fish don't ever seem to be biting. It's got to be something wrong with the bait, if you catch my drift. So I end up here at The Glass-bottomed Mug when I'm feeling low, when I need somebody to talk to. A buddy like you beats TV any day when I'm down.

I could never get into those reality shows myself. Give me sports any day: baseball, golf; that's reality I can relate to. Thinking of which, I promised myself to watch today's Jays-Tigers game.

Yeah, I know it's started, but that's okay.

What about my Mom? I guess I'll get her a yellow rose; she always did like those. I may not feel much, but I can still do right by her. Catch you later, bud.


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This article has been read 371 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Beth LaBuff 05/02/08
This is a very interesting one-sided conversation… that tells a whole story. Your story made me sad… that for whatever reason your MC had no love for his Mom. I'm not one of those "shrink-types" so I'm afraid I can't analyze why. This did make me think. In light of your story, you title is good.
Marilyn Schnepp 05/04/08
Picture three Judges; Randy says "Nice job", Paula says "I liked it", and Simon says..."With no quotation marks of who was saying what...I didn't read past the third paragraph."

I take the 5th, when it comes to who I "ditto".
c clemons05/05/08
Other than the fact that the quotations were missing, it would have been nice to at least introduce who he was speaking to at least once. I like that you didn't go the typical way on a piece about "mother." This is actually good, fix a few things here and there and you have a good entry.