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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: Uncles/Aunts (04/17/08)

TITLE: The Secret
By Shirley McClay
04/24/08


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“I am going to tell you a secret, Girl.” Aunt Gertrude always called me Girl as if it was actually my name. “I am an undercover agent and I need your help to close a case.” She gave me that look as she spoke.

Aunt Gertie’s steel-gray hair was perfectly braided and wrapped around her head like a pioneer woman; her clothing was simple and plain; she made amazing cookies, cakes, and cream pies. She comfortably fit my criteria of the quintessential aunt.

Great-aunt, actually. Aunt Gertie is my grandmother’s sister.

“Ha-ha, Aunt Gertie.” A grizzled eyebrow hiked at my sarcastic tone, but Aunt Gertie grinned at me and winked. Her wintery blue eyes sparkled and my gut butterflied. I had thought she was joking around, but suddenly I wasn’t so sure.

“You just need to accompany me to the mall, like any other normal day.” I nearly choked… normal day?

“Quit looking so goofy, Girl.” Now her eyes sparked instead of sparkled. “Are you willing to help or not?”

I still hadn’t said a word… I couldn’t. So I just nodded and we headed for the car.

We arrived at the mall where things got even stranger. Aunt Gertie began talking softly to… no one. I finally realized she must have one of those hidden radio things you see in the movies. I couldn’t hear what was said, but Aunt Gertie was suddenly in a very big hurry. We rushed into the entrance nearest the food court where we bought subs and found a table near the carousel.

I wasn’t the least bit interested in eating. I knew I was staring at Aunt Gertie as if she was a purple-spotted green alien, but I was still trying to wrap my brain around the last hour of my life. Either my Aunt Gertie was a secret agent or she was truly off her rocker. Either way, my day had taken a roller coaster dippity-twist and I was in danger of losing my breakfast. Lunch was not on the menu.

Aunt Gertie laid the sweetest Grandma smile on me. “How is school going, Emily?” Emily? I couldn’t remember the last time she had actually used my name. I wasn’t sure she even knew it.

“Really, Girl, you need to be more relaxed or you‘ll attract attention from the wrong people. You were supposed to help me blend in.” The spark was back in her eye and I gave myself a shake. If Aunt Gertie could be a secret agent, then I could at least do my part… whatever that was. I was still pretty clueless. She must’ve seen the spark light in my own eyes because she grinned again and gave me an approving nod.

Then Aunt Gertie stiffened slightly and gave my shin a hard kick under the table. Grabbing a pen from her purse, she held it up and started rambling. “This pen was a gift from an old friend. He died last week and I decided to have it mounted and...” I was really lost now… what was with the stupid pen?

She gave me that look and I realized I was supposed to play along. So I nodded and unhuh-ed and pretended to be interested. She kept tipping the pen at funny angles and moving it oddly. It even thumped me once on the ear. I shifted over to get out of the pen’s way. Whatever.

Aunt Gertie abruptly stopped chattering and snickered at me. “Funny girl! You look ridiculous. But we got what we needed. This pen has quite a strong recorder. It can pick up the sound from whatever it points at… as well as record excellent images.” She chuckled and handed it to me. “They never even noticed an old grandma and her doofy granddaughter having lunch together at the mall.”

I stuck my tongue out at her.

I was examining the pen when I received another jolt. “Hi, Sweetheart.” Mom came up behind me, kissed me on the cheek, and slipped the pen from my hands into her shirt pocket. “Nice job, Aunt G. See you at home.” She disappeared into the crowd.

I glared at Aunt Gertie, waiting for an explanation.

“It is a long-standing tradition in our family that one girl from each generation is trained for undercover work. I didn’t have any children so I chose your mother to train. She is one of the best.” Then her twinkle transformed to intensity. “So far.” And she gave me that look.


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This article has been read 701 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Laury Hubrich 04/24/08
Very good story. How funny. Highly entertaining.
Joshua Janoski04/24/08
A very clever entry for this week's topic. Sort of reminds me of the one I entered only a lot different if that even makes sense. :)

I liked the ending where the mom came in. That was a nice little twist. My only complaint is that I would like to have seen more. Maybe you can write additional tales about this undercover family.

Thank you for sharing this.
Sara Harricharan 04/25/08
Oh I do so like this one! I love the secret agent piece! I especially liked the ending and the bit where Girl-er-Emily had to try and play along. You made this very believable! ^_^
Betsy Markman04/28/08
Oh my, I loved this. And I hope Aunt Gertie is real, because she sounds like too much fun to be limited to the pages of fiction!
Jan Ackerson 04/28/08
I went back and forth as I read this, trying to decide if she was schizophrenic or actually a spy, or just a very entertaining aunt. Tell you the truth, I'm still not sure...but it was a very entertaining read.
Debbie Wistrom04/28/08
Great out of the box entry for the topic. Fun roller coaster ride you took us on. Keep it up!
Chely Roach04/28/08
I ditto Jan. I still after a couple re-reads have no idea what was 'real' with Gurtie, but it was a fun read. Uber creative!
Sheri Gordon04/28/08
Okay, I'm a bit confused--but I see by other comments that I'm not the only one.

This reminded me of the crazy lady/teacher in the Magic Schoolbus books. I found Aunt Gerty quite entertaining, even if I didn't follow the storyline completely.

Good voice, and fun read.
Willena Flewelling 04/29/08
I'm confused too... but delighted at the same time. Aunt Gertie is great!
Lynda Schultz 04/29/08
I'm dying to know if these gals were really secret agents or if this was some members of the family putting on another member of the family. In any case, you kept us guessing and it was a good read.
Dee Yoder 04/30/08
Since seeing the movie "A Beautiful Mind", I think I wonder also if stories of intrigue are all in the MC's head-LOL! Great read and how cool would it be to have a family full of women agents?
Loren T. Lowery04/30/08
Your story wove a spell of mystery and intrigue right up there with Nancy Drew, "A Beutiful Mind" and "Matilda"
It held my interest and certainly keep me wondering and looking for more clues as to what was really going on and what was to take place later.
Joanne Sher 04/30/08
Very cute and clever. Lots of fun to read. Enjoyed this a lot!
Angela M. Baker-Bridge 05/01/08
Definitely kept me hooked and wondering... lots of fun.
Peter Stone05/01/08
Enjoyable read, especially the aunt's character and believable dialogue.


   
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