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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: Father (as in paternal parent, not God) (04/10/08)

TITLE: Why I'm Glad I'm Not My Dad
By Sharlyn Guthrie
04/17/08


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Why Iím Glad Iím Not My Dad
(Top Ten Reasons)


Number 10:
I would have to remember all those stories about the old days and put up with my family rolling their eyes at me when I repeated them.

Number 9:
My idea of a great toy would be a brand new mulching lawn mower with variable speeds and a twenty-two inch deck.

Number 8:
My back would ache from all those piggy back rides.

Number 7:
I would know the way to the service station and the hardware store, but I wouldnít have the slightest idea how to get to Aragomís Secret Level 10.

Number 6:
My right arm would always be out of joint from swinging it backward at the kid acting up in the back seat, while steering with the left one.

Number 5:
I would get very tired of apologizing to my kids, my wife, the dog, and the neighbors for accusing them of taking the tools I absent-mindedly misplaced.

Number 4:
I would hate spending an hour in the bathroom every day. (What does he do in there, anyway? And why does he need a book?)

Number 3:
Can you imagine having to ask your kids to interpret your text messages? How embarrassing!

Number 2:
I would have to learn how to say all those famous dad phrases like:
ďListen here, Buster!"
"Donít make me say this twice."
"Not while youíre under my roof!Ē
ďWeíre not lost. I just donít know where we are.Ē

Number 1:
And the number one reason why Iím glad Iím not my dad is this:
Kissing on the lips? Thatís just plain gross!


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This article has been read 700 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Lynda Schultz 04/17/08
Just you wait! History tends to repeat itself. Cute.
Laury Hubrich 04/19/08
Very funny!
Jan Ackerson 04/21/08
This is adorable--you got the voice just right, and the whole thing is laced with affection disguised as exasperation. Very clever.
Joanney Uthe04/21/08
Love it! The voice is perfect, especially the one about the hardware store verses the video game. Very creative entry.
Janice Cartwright04/21/08
My dad was nothing like this man, but when did you meet my husband? I agree your voice is perfect, and the light tone a perfect way to start my day. :)
Gerald Shuler 04/21/08
I loved the light and loving feel of this entry. Well done. You could send this to David Letterman to read on Father's Day.
Betty Castleberry04/21/08
Very cute. This needs to put on the fridge. Thanks for this adorable read.
Sheri Gordon04/21/08
Adorable. Really good POV. Creative take on the topic. (David Letterman may be calling you.)
Dee Yoder 04/21/08
Ha! This is cute and should be placed in every new dad's pocket so he knows just what he'll be like in a few years! I could see my dad AND my husband in this top 10 list. (;
Leigh MacKelvey04/21/08
Clever, clever! Good job on not being sappy ( like my entry is)on a sappy-type topic. I loved it!
Lyn Churchyard04/22/08
LOL, this is great. Very different entry. Very, very well done.
Loren T. Lowery04/22/08
What a cute, creative way to present this theme. And, as a dad, I accept almost everyone of these as defining myself at times --- very insightful on your part. Great job.
Joanne Sher 04/22/08
Cute and fun, Sharlyn! Have you shared this with the men in your life? Enjoyed this - made me giggle.
Marilee Alvey04/22/08
This was adorable. Neat idea you had. It's lighthearted and fun to read. This is an excellent comedic technique: take some universal truths and make us all chuckle because we relate! Well done!
Corinne Mann 04/23/08
I absolutely loved this!!!!! It is cute and funny along with very creative writing.
Excellent job!