The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 1401 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
03/14/08
I'd say she was glad she made hay while the sun was shining--especially since her brother's friend was cute. :)
Some good descriptions here, especially love this "the last rays snickering at the day."
03/17/08
(smile) Your style was "random". I could feel the disconnected and conflicting thoughts in the fragmented sentences.
I don't know if you meant it that way, but that's how it came out.
It's a good lesson on being prepared. Thanks for writing this.
The main thing that struck me with this story, was the way your MC prayed for help before doing the grocery shopping. That alone is a lesson in itself. This is definitely on target here. Well done!!

And now I must go and water my pot plants, they are looking a little bedraggled :)
03/17/08
Enjoyed this very much. No arm twisting needed to finish. Great job. God bless.
Surely, God directs our steps. I liked the way this story plays out. A "feel good" story about sticking to one's plan because not all things that happen to us are random at all.
Feels great to get the shopping all done, even if the sunshine can only be ignored through the car windows. Fun story.
03/17/08
I totally enjoyed this story - and the outcome. The very short paragraphs made the reading a little choppy, but I very much felt for this poor girl doing errands on a beautiful day. And I was glad for her the next morning! Good job.
03/18/08
Crazy day! Be careful of tense changes--I was a little confused at times. You conveyed her/your harried pace well. I also enjoyed the perspective that God has a plan for the day that is often not ours.
03/19/08
I liked the pace of this, it mirrored my own choppy thoughts and I followed it easily.
03/19/08
A creative and effective piece for this topic! The pacing works well for this story, but I echo the comment about being consistent in tenses. Some of your story is written in present tense and some in past. Nice entry with a good message!
Joint. I wrote a forgetable poem once by that name. Now, 99.99 percent of this I truely enjoyed, until you reminded me of that bad poem.:)
Just kidding, I love your style and flow and the way you pace your stories. And they are always well done. Thanks again for an enjoyable expereince.
I really enjoyed your story. I find when I have so much to do, the only thing to do is to pray, and somehow, with God's help everything gets done. Very Nicely Written.
A fun article, in fact, I was out of breath at the end of the shopping and running day. I definitely felt the emotion. Good job of showing.