The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
06/06/05
Sorry - the last bit of the last verse should read:-

"What joy is mine
That I will be
With you for all
Eternity"

You will never know just how often I checked this through and still missed the mistake!
06/06/05
Nicely done. I liked the rhythm of four syllables per line, but you got away from that. It would be nice if the whole poem was uniform in meter.
06/06/05
Great thoughts!
06/06/05
Very touching.
This was beautifully written and a blessing to read - it brought tears to my eyes as I imagined the criminal's thoughts that you portrayed in this lovely poem. Yours in Christ
06/08/05
The beat shift in the second stanza bothers me a little, I understand the shift in the final stanza, but the second stands out. The poem is well posed, and carries a wonderful meaning. Generally, well done.
06/08/05
Thank you, Melanie, for composing this poem wth such care. Really like the twist when the Point Of View is revealed.
06/09/05
A very moving poem!
06/09/05
Touched my heart. I loved it! ~LG~