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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: Illustrate the meaning of "Actions Speak Louder than Words" (without using the actual phrase). (02/21/08)

TITLE: Dame Bumble and Dame Humble
By Denise Pienaar
02/25/08


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Long, long ago,
In a land that I know,
There once lived two funny old dames.
They both used to pray
In their own special way,
Dame Bumble and Humble, their names.

Dame Bumble was loud,
And would yell to the crowd,
Of her praises to God everyday.
She would roar and would shout,
Till the crowd ran about,
And fled to get out of her way.

Dame Humble was kind,
And the crowd did not mind,
When she told them of Godís mighty love.
With one gentle touch,
She showed them how much,
Was the beauty of Heaven above.

With a crash and a rumble,
Along came Dame Bumble,
And bellowed right up to the sky.
All the children in tears,
Tried to cover their ears,
And all of them started to cry.

Dame Humble would come,
And show everyone,
That there really was nothing to fear.
Sheíd calm them all down,
And remove every frown.
And remind them that Godís ever near.

Dame Bumble meant well,
When she screamed about Hell,
But she frightened each woman and man.
And they would all shout:
Dame Bumbleís about,
Run away, run as fast as you can.

Dame Humble again,
Would soothe all their pain,
And teach them of Godís perfect peace.
Learn how to forgive,
So forever youíll live,
In Heaven where joy will not cease.


With a loud clap of thunder,
In Bumble would blunder,
And the houses would shiver and shake.
She would shatter the glass,
And shrivel the grass,
And the earth would a-quiver and quake.

With the warmth of the sun,
Dame Humble, she won,
All the hearts of the people with love.
They fell to their knees,
And prayed to God, please,
Let us worship our Father above.

So what do you see?
Itís as plain as can be.
Itís the things that you do, not say,
That will open the gate,
Of love and not hate,
And will show people Godís perfect way.


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This article has been read 632 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Jacquelyn Horne03/01/08
Very on-topic poem. Good job.
Beth LaBuff 03/01/08
Your title really got my curiosity going. : ) This type of poetry is not easy to write and youíve done a great job with the rhyme and meter. Iím truly impressed. Youíve chosen the perfect names for the ladies. Dame Bumble -- which she definitely did. : ), then Dame Humble -- what a beautiful character. I loved this: With a loud clap of thunder,
In Bumble would blunder, - And the houses would shiver and shake. - She would shatter the glass, - And shrivel the grass, - And the earth would a-quiver and quake. Youíve done really nice work on this creative entry.



Jan Ackerson 03/02/08
Very entertaining poem!

A poet as gifted as you is ready to move on to more complex and unexpected rhymes--rhymes of two or three syllables, fewer cliche' rhymes like "love" and "above". I know you can do it--this is superb!
LauraLee Shaw03/02/08
Love your title and the message in this toe tapper. Well done.
Holly Westefeld03/04/08
Nice job with this rolicking rhythm, and clear illustration of the topic. Unless you needed the word count, I think you could have omitted the final stanza, as you had done such a good job of showing, that telling was unnecessary.