The Official Writing Challenge
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This is sad. It is well written with the dialogue and the feelings felt by all the characters. I could relate to this being one who struggles with depression.
02/28/08
I , too, can see this as a fight with depression. The story is well thought out, and 'felt' by the reader. The ending is sweet.
Wow. Yeah I could identify in so many ways. This is very real. Well done.
02/29/08
Very authentic, and complex, well-drawn characters. I could feel for them. Very well done.
03/01/08
Touching story.

I initially thought it was about the two girls.
03/01/08
Gracie is a very authentic little girl--dealing with confusing emotions as best as she can. I really fell for her.

I don't really see the topic here...

I'm glad you gave the family a loving, godly father/husband. Depression is such a horrible thing (I've been there...)
03/01/08
I could just see little Allison stomping her foot. The dialog of the little girls was very good. Your story is sad, but heartwarming. Nice work!
03/02/08
This story drew me in. I could relate almost perfectly with the little girl, and I felt agony for the mommy as well. I know this will be a message that many need to hear.
How human is this story! It really speaks to those who are struggling to find answers to illness and the problems that can arise.
03/03/08
Very nicely done. The dialogue is good and the emotions are right on the surface. Great job!
03/03/08
The emotions and dialog are so authentic in this. I saw the topic at the very end where Gracie crawls in bed with her Mommy--after having said she hated her mom. I like this!!
03/03/08
Oh, this is good. I thought the mom was an alcoholic until the end. I love Gracie's change of heart, then going to curl up with her mom. So much emotion. Super.
This is a sad, tender loving story. I got the impression it was cancer or something like that the family is dealing with. I'm glad Gracie crawled into bed with her mom. And that her mom held her in her arms. Both actions showed love.
Nicely done story.
I thought that the mother was a drug addict, but then towards the end, I decided that it was more than likely depression she was facing. I've been there myself.

I saw the topic in the little girl's actions, when she went into her mother's room to be with her.

Touching story. I appreciate you sharing this.
Very well written. Depression is such an insidious thing. Love and support is definitely what is needed, and little Gracie and her daddy did just that. Wonderful story.
03/05/08
Beautiful story...chronic pain affects so many more lives than the original 'victim". I loved it.
Great dialog, thanks for sharing a tough time.
This well written story so touched my heart. Pain is a monster, as you know, but the love shown by Mother and daughter was better than lots of love words. The father's love was also very telling.
I like that you didn't name what the illness was. Although others have mentioned depression, I think it could fit a few other things as well. It makes this story relatable (is that a word?) to many more people. Very good writing.
03/05/08
Amazing story dear Laury. I especially love the last paragraph... could pin that up on my wall;-)... I agree with what was said earlier.. it's cool that it can be applied to many different situations. Nicely done and I see the topic shining clear.
03/05/08
Wow. I felt so bad for Gracie. I could see and feel this family's pain and especially the ending, that was heart-breaking! I'm glad though, at the last paragraph, that there is hope. YOu did well here. There is one note though, a few times I think dialouge was tagged onto one of Gracie's actions making it seem like it was Gracie speaking instead of her mom, otherwise, everything else was good! ^_^
03/05/08
This is a wonderful story told from the side of a family member watching a loved one's illness. You captured the sadness and frustration, as well as the love and attempt at understanding. Great job!
03/05/08
Such a wonderful story of real emotions in difficult situations. Knowing who wrote it made me think of a certain type of pain, but I find it interesting what others have concluded. I agree that leaving it an unknown disease has the effect of Paul not naming his "thorn in the side." We all can relate better to the story because the illness is unnamed.