The Official Writing Challenge
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Member
Date
02/22/08
Wow! Your depth of thought is amazing with this. I'd never heard the old rhyme. I've seen in cemeteries sometimes four tombstones of children (from the same family) that all died from that dreadful influenza during that time. I feel like I may be missing some symbolism (like the three nails in the door). I liked your allusion to the "angel of death", and I think the little girls ended up getting the influenza from the Doctor (through the window) despite the Mother's precautions. Your writing is exceptional.
02/22/08
I didn't know about this ryhme, but it certainly fits and in the end it's pretty fitting. This was so rich and descriptive. Nice writing! ^_^
02/24/08
Stunning, breathtaking (no pun intended). This voice is haunting and beautiful.

Ummm...toward the end you have "angle of death" instead of "angel of death." Sorry...

Your writing is just outstanding.