The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
02/21/08
OOoohh! I was trying to push him across the line too. I would imagine it would be hard to live in someone's shadow with all the expectations. Your descriptions of running and cross country races are perfect. (I went to a lot of HS and a few state meets with my daughter.) You were definitely on topic with this. Nice work.
02/22/08
It's hard to live in a shadow, but I wish that he hadn't had to hurt himself to prove such a dark point to his father. Touch decision, and I'm sure he'll live with it for the rest of his life, but this was good, you brought us into the story and kept us there. ^_^
Very good storytelling. I was there pulling for J.R. The father's attitude is so sad. Good job!
02/24/08
Oh, ouch. My heart hurts for the young man. Having run cross-country in high school, I know how much competition and pressure can be applied to the young... to have it come from a parent is even more devistating. Excellent writing. Fabulous illustration of the cliche. Thank you.
02/24/08
Wonderful job of characteriation!
Ouch! You hit the topic on so many levels--the father whose selfishness causes him to embitter his son, denying him the vicarious victory, the son denying himself and his school the championship just to exact revenge, and, of course, the son making a fool of himself in front of the college scouts.
02/28/08
Congratulations on Highly Commended! NOWWWWWW you have to change your title... ;)