The Official Writing Challenge
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02/14/08
I love the XYZ moment -- haven't heard that in years. Very funny, and well written. Good job with the topic.
02/15/08
Excellent characterization - and you certainly put us right in that room with them all. Love the MC's internal monologue especially, and the end.
02/15/08
Oh my. Talk about a memorable introduction! I loved the humor sprinkled throughout! Especially the XYZ!!
02/16/08
What a title! This was a good story and I love the ending!
Laury
02/18/08
Isn't it amazing what some people eat? I enjoyed your choice for this topic, Don't think anyone could have descibed it better in so few words. I'm really reading to see what others say because I don't know very much about the tricks of the trade. I would say love conquers all. Good one.
02/18/08
This story made me feel good all over. I love it. (I'm a sucker for a love story, anyway). It was so refreshing to see the rich couple portrayed as kind and compassionate. I loved the humor and how they got a laugh out of it. It's how, I think, many would respond.

It reminds me of the first time I met my sister's husband. They'd just driven in from A & M (whoop) and he was car sick (Perhaps she had been driving). He said "Hello" and then dashed to the toiled to barf. I'm not THAT scarey.
02/18/08
Oh my..... this was great! I love your sense of humor. I think it might even be as twisted as mine. lol This was such an endearing story and it kept my attention all the way through. Great job!
02/18/08
Ok, as an official sushi addict, I am mortified by this story. I love the humor sprinkled into the romance. Great job!
02/18/08
Too funny! Such a bungled, embarrassing beginning for your MC, but you still managed to tug at my heart strings with the love story. Great job!
02/18/08
So many details here and they all sparkle, I can see why it is a jewel. Would love to have a love like this.....
02/18/08
The details MADE this story! Great characterization, too. I loved the details like the MC tucking in his shirt and buckling his pants and all the rest. Really, really enjoyed this one!
02/19/08
Ahh Sir William... you have done it again. Your characters are so human. Right on topic (though what a way to show it!)
I'm with your MC... raw fish? No way, not for this little black duck.
Super job!
02/19/08
Well done. So funny! It reminded me of one of the scenes in 'Meet the Parents'! The poor guy - I'm just glad the inlaws reacted so well.
02/19/08
Oh, this is hilarious! I lost it on the "chain reaction", and didn't stop grinning once through the rest of the story. Priceless!
02/19/08
This heart-warming and humorous story was very enjoyable.
02/19/08
I loved it, though I can't understand why anyone would get sick on sushi.

The last line caused me to stumble. Maybe I'm old-fashioned, but I would have assumed that since they are all believers there wouldn't be a question about who was sleeping where.

Great story—one of those days that one would like to start over and do right!
02/19/08
One thing's for sure: he could hardly do anything worse after that introduction! Laugh-out-loud-funny and I like the wealthy couple's attitude, too.
02/20/08
One of my favorites this week! Hilarious and lighthearted, but very well written. I've read it a couple of times now and it just gets better.
02/20/08
Aw... sweet love story! This was a lot of fun to read. Your poor MC got put through the wringer. :) You're very skilled in your story-writing.
02/20/08
ROFL! I felt so glad to be vegetarian after reading this. LOL! It was just too funny, the "XYZ" coming from the Mother, was also too funny. I liked how you set everything in motion and kept it going with the mint and then the last line of "Separate rooms" That was just too funny! I think you did great with this one. ^_^
02/20/08
This is wonderful, and too much fun besides. Of course I LOVE the name of your MC's promised. :0)
I'm glad Betty's parents saw what their daughter saw in her beloved.
Excellent Sir William!
02/20/08
The sushi would have done me in, too. I could see this playing out as a movie, with lots more adventures of the newly engaged couple to follow. I really enjoyed the humor in the story.
02/20/08
Don't forget they'll forget this evening in a hurry. Loved the XYZ line.
02/21/08
Boy did you get a lot of comments ;) This was really good, probably because it was so real.