The Official Writing Challenge
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Member
Date
02/04/08
Your descriptions are good in this heart-breaking lesson for Billy. (it's an excellent adult lesson too). Good work on this perfect illustration of the topic.
02/04/08
I really enjoyed this. This felt SO accurate - and this doesn't just happen with kids. :)

If it were me, I might have ended this a few sentences up - you don't really need to "explain" the lesson he learned - you showed it above. Maybe ending with mom grinning would have been fine.

Great title too - enjoyed this piece.
02/04/08
It's a good thing that some of the glittery things of life let us down. Helps us to get our priorities right. Good message right on topic.
I think you must have enjoyed writing this. Thanks!