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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: Illustrate the meaning of “All that Glitters is Not Gold” (without using the actual phrase or literal example). (01/24/08)

TITLE: True Beauty Revealed
By LaNaye Perkins
01/30/08


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She was a beauty, that was for sure
Thick mane and tail, stunningly pure
Her build was perfect, her lines demure
With her spirit and pride she allured

The buyer smitten, wholly drawn in
The mare stunning, the auction she‘d win
Blinded to signs drugs hid deep within
And her scars concealed by evil men

Not till the medicines eased their hold
Did her damaged nature show so bold
For years of abuse left scars untold
Her mind damaged by humans so cold

Compelled by love the new owner prayed
Seeking God’s wisdom every day
To help this mare in every way
Her heart determined never to sway

As kind years passed the mare understood
This human was kind, yes she was good
Her mind forgot the evil untold
Her heart a place where love again flowed

Such is the tale, a mare once abused
Who God did place, for a life renewed
With broken mind, though flawless appeared
Her life now blessed, true beauty revealed

*The poem above is a true account of a mare who was terribly abused the first seventeen years of her life. She was shown successfully in Western Pleasure and Carriage, until arthritis made her useless. She was used by humans because of her beauty, until she had nothing left to give. Then they discarded her and sold her at an auction.

Because she was so poorly handled she was left an emotional wreck and quite dangerous to humans. It took years of loving kindness, and a lot of patience, before the years of abuse started melting away.

A loving spirit and willing attitude have begun to emerge from the mare these days. How sad that it got buried so many years ago by callous humans who wanted only to advance their reputations in the show ring: Humans who gave little, if any, regard to the mare’s needs.

She has a home where she will always be loved and given gentle care now. And the true beauty she was born with has finally been revealed.


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This article has been read 660 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Joanne Sher 01/31/08
Both the poem and the explanation are beautiful. I definitely empathized with this poor horse. Good job especially evoking emotion in the reader.
Joy Faire Stewart02/02/08
Very touching entry and well written...a voice for those who have no voice.
Beth LaBuff 02/03/08
Your tale of this mare is beautifully written. How sad about her exploitation and how wonderful that you found her. I enjoyed reading this. Your illustration of the topic is good.
Gerald Shuler 02/06/08
Beautiful poem. The topic was a bullseye hit. It also ended as an anti-topic because the real glitter that was hidden by the false glitter was once again able to shine.

RED INK: Every reader has a different opinion when it comes to good poetry, so take this only as one person's opinion.

I felt like some of the lines were forced just to make the rhyme work. Some slight revision could make them all flow smoothly. If you would like, I could PM some examples and suggestions.

Like I said, though, just one person's opinion.

The poem was wonderful anyway.
Sara Harricharan 02/06/08
This gave me goosebumps and brought a tear to my eye. To think that humans can be so cruel sometimes-just to get ahead for something that someday will no longer matter. I am glad that Mare had help though and that love was able to reach her and she had a safe and caring home. Beautiful work! ^_^
Holly Westefeld02/06/08
This was certainly effective at evoking emotion.
Laury Hubrich 02/06/08
Wow! Great poem! I can see your love of horses coming through clearly:) I'm glad this horse had someone fighting for him!
Laury
Beckie Stewart02/06/08
I really enjoyed this piece. Reminds me of Black Beauty.
Loren T. Lowery02/06/08
I know this kind of abuse happens and it is appaling. No landscape is large enough to hold the love of those who care for and take the time to redeem these magnificant animals. My spirit is lifted by your joyful poem. And with that I just might give my own mare an extra carrot tonight when I feed her. Thank you for sharing your heart.
Verna Cole Mitchell 02/06/08
Naye, your narrative poem is perfectly delightful--a very different, but head-on example of the topic.