The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
01/25/08
There was lots of fun in this story--I could see it all unfolding and I enjoyed it immensely.

The first paragraph and the last both seemed a little bit unnecessary, and I was unclear of Betsy's age--she lived with her mother, but seemed like an independent adult.

I enjoy your writing style!
I enjoyed reading this and would have died being in that car and furious for getting blamed for someone else's mistake. This was good.
01/28/08
Great story - perfect for the topic. I agree about the 1st and last paragraph - they add vague information that doesn't add to your story line. The line about arguing in the stopped car before they pulled over threw me. I had to think about it for a bit. Anyway, this was a really fun read. Enjoyed it!
01/30/08
I was chuckling during the driving scene. Very entertaining story and great for the topic.
01/30/08
Oh does this bring back the horror stories of driving! I did just fine when my 'turn' came, but let's just say you couldn't say a word for the next few hours until the tension wore off! ^_^ This is realistic in feel and setting, I like the twist that she hit a cop's car-that put a new angle on the story. Good writing. ^_^
01/30/08
I enjoyed the humorous element to your story. Your title is perfect! You've illustrated the topic very well! I would imagine you had a blast writing this! :)