The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
01/18/08
Excellent--and I love the 2nd line of the 2nd stanza.
01/18/08
This is good! I like the flow and style, especially the use of the word "Bliss" a feeling we all can relate to. Great job! ^_^
03/26/08
I'm catching up on some reading and arrived here from Jan's Master Class (assonance). I must say I'm very impressed with the words you used and your word flow. Your title is perfect and this poem is perfect for the topic "bird in the hand". I love the carrot/temptation metaphor. The wisdom you've shown in this is so good ("And I will wait for Father’s plans...") I'm glad I read this beautifully written poem.