The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
01/17/08
Oh, I have goosebumps, the sad kind, and tears are flowing freely. You had me totally in the middle of this story, and sadly, I know it is true for so many women and children. You wrote it very well, and I pray it has impact on the people who need it most.
01/18/08
Excellent story... very well-written.
01/18/08
Oh my, this is superb writing.
01/21/08
This is powerful. Her situation is terrifying - I found myself hoping it would turn out for the better even though I knew what would happen.
01/22/08
This reaches right into the heart. Well done.
01/22/08
Great story, and the ending a surprise in that it was a drunken accident rather than murder that took the parents' lives.
No surprise that Jack wouldn't let her drive, or, unfortunately, that she got in the passenger seat. So sad!
01/22/08
Wow. This was so well written and the message was very powerful. Thank you for writing this, it really ministered to me today.
What a sad true to life story, I loved this sentence. "Tears refused to fall but only because fear had built a dam to hold them back."
Keep up the good words!
I'm stunned...in a good way. This is wonderful writing, and the message is excellent. Five stars from me.
Great writing. One of my favorite tell-all lines, "I don't need love...I need Jack." That seems to sum it all up and look at the price she, her daughter and mother had to pay. Great job with the flashback and the transitions back to the present as well.
01/23/08
The format was perfect for this story. It gave us a hint about what happened and the flashback brought the emotions and reality of what was going to happen to the forefront. Good story!
This is so sad! I was riveted reading from beginning to end, this gave me goosebumps reading this. WOW. Excellent writing. ^_^
Absolutely powerful writing
01/23/08
There should have been a tissue warning on this!! Excellent. Now I gotta go find a tissue! :-)
01/24/08
Very well done. Red ink: I think you could use a Thesaurus to make regular phrases more unique, e.g. she bit her lip/she stretched out her bottom lip and scratched at an imaginary spot on it.
01/24/08
I am in tears at the end -- wow! Powerful.
01/24/08
Excellent writing. The format is perfect. The dialogue is realistic. Very powerful. Great job with the topic.
01/24/08
Wow! I like the clever way you told this. Your title is perfect. GREAT writing!
01/24/08
Such a lovely and touching story and so well written. I loved it!