The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
01/10/08
A lovely, tender scene between mother and baby. I'm not sure I follow the whole story though. What was with the police lights and everything?
This is beautifully poetic prose--such wonderful pictures you made with your words. I could feel the mother's tender love for her baby son and her desire to start out right with him at the very beginning so he would be protected from making the mistakes causing such havoc in her life.
I love the description of the relationship between the mom and baby here -beautifully written, and the story itself so haunting. Really really like this one!
01/11/08
If this is who I think it is - you're early ;). This piece is absolutely gorgeous and tactile and haunting. Love it.
01/13/08
I want to know more! But what you have written for us is beautiful, haunting, touching. Love it.
01/14/08
You are an expert! This piece brims with hope and speaks to the overcomer in all of us. Great depth and description. Welcome back but maybe you could have waited another week? I don't enter often :>
Exquisitely bittersweet. What masterful writing! Great to have you back! (I think...LOL!)
As I currently have a baby, I could really relate to much of this story and the mother's emotions. It was sweet and powerful. When I finished, I thought, "Was that on topic?" And then I said the topic to myself...and thought, "Oh, yes! It is on topic." Thank you for sharing this precious "stitch in time."
Poignant and sweet and an endaring, creative way to present the topic.
01/14/08
Beautiful.
01/14/08
How on earth do you manage to write so utterly convincingly from a nursing mother's POV? Amazing!
01/14/08
Simply beautiful.
01/14/08
This is brilliant - the juxtaposition of the soft words inside and harsh words outside portray 2 worlds at odds with each other. Great description of a nursing mom with her baby.
I'm afraid that this was a bit too subtle for me to feel like I had a good grasp on everything. Was Matt an older sibling over whom the mother was regreting mistakes, vowing to do things differently with this child?
01/14/08
Awesome writing, as usual, but I've read this twice and still can't figure out who Matt is, and if he's the kid's dad, then why is he gone and why is there so much fear?
01/14/08
Beautiful description of the tender interaction between a trusting newborn and a fierce mother. Matt's haunting provides additional eerie tension. I loved it!
01/14/08
Heartwarming, heartfelt and brilliant on so many levels!
One of my favorites this week!
This is both tender and haunting. The descriptions of the nursing baby are extremely vivid. I understand the feelings presented in this piece, but I'm left wanting to know more.
01/15/08
Beautiful...Poignant...
I liked the way you put us in the setting with vivid shadows and lights.
01/15/08
How could a man understand the bond of a nursing woman?
Wow! You did it wonderfully!
Is the misspelled word "singing" instead of "singeing"?
Your descriptions are so vivid that I could see the baby, see the room, everything.
This is lovely, yet chilling. Very well done.
01/16/08
Wow, this story is absolutely riveting. I can't say enough about the descriptions and the imagery. It made me sad when I read the part about the mother automatically flinching when she caught a glimpse of the police lights. I felt the heaviness of the baby in her arms, and the light on the walls-everything. Excellent. Made me think about how many mothers are having midnight moments like this one; so bittersweet.
01/16/08
I love this piece. You paint poignant pictures with your words. I feel I am there watching the whole scene unfold; I can personally experience the sadness and tenderness.
01/16/08
Wow, are you sure you have never nursed a baby? Amazing writing. I could feel the mothers determination.
01/16/08
Fantastic writing...like a chapter from the middle of a masterful novel!
01/16/08
I was wrapped up in the mother/baby protective emotions then the scene taking place outside that had already swallowed one family member. The mother really came alive in your writing. Great work!