The Official Writing Challenge
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12/07/07
Honest and hard-hitting - and a bit too convicting for me ;) I think all moms can relate to this - very engaging writing.
12/09/07
What an excellent, realistic article that encourages us to examine our attitude when we do something.
This line cracked me up - "My husband walked in the door and looked at me. I knew he was trying to gauge my mood. I wouldn’t blame him if he turned around went back to work."
12/09/07
I had a feeling this was yours. Superb pace and use of dialogue. Your voice, as always, is refreshing and honest. I do hope though, Mom had some special treats for the kids when Home Group was over. Your MC is certainly blessed with a great, understanding husband. I would have liked to hear what he had to say to the kids when they left. I am glad though, the group was willing to lighten the MCs burden. A nice take on the topic. God bless.
12/09/07
Very convicting entry here, Kristen. I've been in the same place before, many times. This was very real and had a good lesson at the end:)
Laury
12/09/07
Great sensory presentation. I could hear and see your dialogue. Plus, a good message of which we sometimes need reminded. Loved it.
12/09/07
You are always so honest about things some of us try to hide. Great message and writing!
Ooh! Can I ever relate to this...in days gone by, of course. Actually, my husband is sometimes the undeserving recipient these days. Very realistic and honest.
12/09/07
This is really good. Your transparency is refreshing as well as convicting. Sometimes we get so caught up in pleasing everyone except those closest to us--the ones most deserving of our attention, patience, and love. Great work! :)
12/09/07
I love the bit in all-caps--just really brought home exactly how your protagonist was feeling.

My only "red pen" comment is about the title--I think it should be as creative and original as the rest of this story, rather than this clever, but familiar, phrase.

The pacing of this is masterful...crescendo, climax, decrescendo. Perfect.
12/10/07
I don't even have the excuse of the kids,but can still relate to the problem. Thanks for the lesson. Well done.
Do I detect a little hyperbole in describing your MC? I've read what you've written about your children and know how dear they are to you. Literary license is permitted though, and I loved your story. I think you represented all moms when you described how hard it is to take care of kids and get something accomplised at the same time.
12/11/07
Hehe. I can relate to this one--especially the 'manic monster' part. (Thank God for Wonderful husbands!!) As far as red ink? I'd have to switch pens and grab my green pen (green as in: Good to go.) and give you a smiley face. I've reread this several times (and felt the sting of the lesson each time) and really couldn't find anything to ink. I really liked that you ended it where you did and didn't spell out every little detail, but gave me a chance to draw out my own applications. Way to go!
I concur with the rest, and wonder when you were a fly on my wall. *grin* This was toward the top of my list.
12/12/07
This may sound strange, but this brought tears to my eyes, I am soooooo like this on Wed when I have to gather 6 kids from various locations to take to youth group. When I do not get my Wednesdays off at work it's even worse!

You sure gave me something to think about and I thank you for that, why do we hurt the ones we love the most when we are trying to actually better their lives.

Thanks for this! Great convicting writing I am sure I am not the only one who had a wake up call with this one.

We all write for a reason--His purpose!
12/12/07
I got a chuckle at your title--love it! Great job setting up this message for all the Marthas out there. :)
12/12/07
Lolz. I like this. The transparency of you as the writer, shows through this piece as well, to make it so easy for your readers to relate to it. I loved the part with 'sit down and no one will get hurt'. Too funny!

RED PEN: I love one liners because they carry such a huge impact when staggered together. Just my own opinion-if the lines where she is grateful for her husband's help, is in a paragraph of it's own, it would pull a little more humor with it. The second sentence is when she is sayin she is a blessed woman. Other than that, I think everything was great! ^_^
12/12/07
The title caught my attention because my grandfather (who recently passed away) would say 'the hostess with the mostess" to my grandma all the time! Home Groups are wonderful, but those hours and minutes leading up to the meeting time can be MOSTESS stressful! Excellent writing.
I love how you describe the emotional turmoil your MC faced and her honesty when asking for prayer. The voice of this story seemed perfect to me.
12/13/07
***Congrats!***
12/13/07
I love this. I have 5 children born within 8 years and their younger years were mayhem and madness.I fully identify with your MC. Well done.
12/13/07
Kristen, this is wonderful and poignant. I had days like this when I fully regretted the impatience I showed toward my husband and son, so yes! It's a convicting message for me and most moms! Congratulations on your EC!
12/13/07
Congratulations on your EC. You are masterful at sharing everyday struggles. You keep it real and entertaining. Very good writing.
12/13/07
What a convicting piece of writing. Excellent. Congrats, Kristen! Love, Cat
Very true to life---I could relate. Congratulations on a well-deserved win!
12/18/07
I smile when I read this. It must be real difficult for the main character in your story to be a mother to a bunch of SWEET, ADORABLE children. :)

She is sweet, the main character in your story. I like the way your portray her... the tone in the story clearly shows her state of anxiousness...

I can hear Jesus calling, Martha... martha...