The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Really well-written, and I love the realistic personalities of the two young men...but I've got to say that once I'd seen snakes in the water, there's NOTHING that would have gotten me in there!
Enjoyed reading this piece. You created a vivid, memorable scene.

I don't think you needed the verse at the end. The story stands well on its own.
You got the voice perfect in this, and the symbolism was just right.
I love the snake/fish thing happening here - creates an image that stays in the mind - a positive one of the power of Christ. Maybe a little too much "telling" at the beginning, but once the snake got slithering, I was drawn right in.
Loved the symbolism. Are you sure it was a fish? Might've been a gator. Pace slowed a little in the beginning with background story--not sure if so many details were truly necessary. Loved the tail--oops, mean the tale. Great twist on baptism.
I agree with Jan -- don't think I would be staying long in that water with snakes around! Of course, with the snake-eating fish -- maybe... But if the fish are big enough to eat a snake -- I still don't know about that... Great story!
Wow! I didn't quite see that one coming, even with your title. Great story! I liked the friendship between the two MC's. It was believable and true. Good job. ^_^
Okay, that might have been enough to send me to a sprinklin' church. A snake and I would not have simultaneously been in that water, or anywhere near that water.

Nice writing, and good analogy. (After I got over the creeps.)
Great symbolism, although reptiles really aren't my thing, especially elongated ones. This was a good read, and very well written.
Just now getting around to reading some of the Baptism entries. :) This was really imaginative Dee but yes a little scary. Good characterizations and story line.
Very nice writing! I loved the ending but also the dialogue and attention to details.
I like the way your characters and the scene came to life!
Dee, I've been looking for Front Page Showcase material, and I came across this wonderful story again. It's still great, and I plan to feature it on the week of Feb. 18. Look for it on the FW home page!
Thanks, Dee, for pointing us to your Front Page story (which I might have otherwise missed). I enjoyed everything about this entry.
So glad to see this on the front page of FW, Dee. This is a fabulously entertaining story with a great message. Congrats!
Congrats on your front page showcase-glad I got to read this again! ^_^
This is so creatively written Dee. Congrats on being the FW Frontpage Showcase author. You're having a good week. :)
I missed this first time around, so glad it was posted here on the front page. Wonderful story. Go Big Fish!