The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
08/30/07
I really liked your use of dialogue. Very appropriate for the story. I also liked your descriptions. The "ruffled white sleeves" reminded me of all the pirate movies I've ever seen. I think Sci-Fi is a good genre for you!
Wow, quite an adventure! Great characters with a "fearful" mission. Fascinating story.
08/31/07
I really like your intentional anachronisms--quite clever!

A few punctuation faults, mostly with commas and apostrophes here and there.

This has a spirit of adventure to it, and is very visual.
I enjoyed both the humor and the adventure in the story.
09/04/07
Great story; a swashbuckling scfi! I've not read that combination before, but it was really a lot of fun. I like the characters and the setting, too.
09/04/07
Very intriguing, imaginative piece! I'm a bit confused, though, as to whether this ship was a spaceship or a sea-going ship. It talked about sails and salty air, but also talked about sailing the skies. Anyway, your descriptions were excellent, and I enjoyed the story! :)
Yahoo! I LOVE this cyber-swashbucling-captain! Great story! I want MORE!!!
09/05/07
Very good story. I could picture it as I read. Just a couple more proof reads would have helped. Very nicely done, the dialog was excellent
09/05/07
This is a creative hybrid, all right. It sounds rather like a Hollywood movie in which one isn't sure what is real, what is dream, and what is spoof! You pulled it off well, I think. Great discriptions, too.
09/11/07
I think it’s very hard to mix genres and I’m not sure that 750 words is enough space to do justice to your creation – perhaps a 2000 word short story format would be better. I like the buccaneer imagery and the sci-fi touches are intriguing, while the allusions to spiritual warfare cry out for further development. I just think that together it’s all too ambitious for such a limited word count.