The Official Writing Challenge
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08/30/07
Heartbreakingly lovely story. Blessings, Teri
08/31/07
Having been in a place like that, this moved me. No telling how many children, or teens, need to be heard. Secrets, sitting in the dark, can ruin lives. This really hit home to me. If only we could see through fascades into the hearts of the victims.
You did a wonderful job of writing this heart-rending story.
08/31/07
Marvelous. You know what broke my heart? This kid is in the closet trying to think nice thoughts and no matter how hard the kid tries, those thoughts return to the evil suffered. Your story is also a reminder to me that teachers should acknowledge that not all families function perfectly and talk openly about dysfunctional families. It might make kids who are living this nightmare feel safer in coming forward. Very good work.
This certainly did fit for "fearful," but it really made me sad. No child should ever have to be in a position like this, but thank God for those in whom they might confide. This is written extremely well.
09/01/07
Extremely powerful writing. Your descriptions are excellent. Wow.
09/02/07
You did a great job conveying the feelings here. This piece saddened me, but at the end I found a hope of relief.

Great work.
09/03/07
Powerful. It's just amazingly powerful. Thank you for being brave enough to write it.
09/03/07
So sad, and written with a great deal of heart.

I'm not sure if the present tense "works" for a child's voice, and sometimes the vocabulary is "older" than the child seems to be. Just a personal choice for me, though, and nothing major.

Your writing is skillful and beautiful, and I love the courage and hope at the end.
09/04/07
It is sad that these situations occur. What struck me is the fact that the child had to be taught that "normal" was not what she was living. I've personally seen that, too. What a wonderful expression of such a sad situation.

Debbie
09/05/07
The title of this story drew me in. I'm glad I stayed. A heartwrenching tale told through the eyes of its little victim. Think happy thoughts, child. Help is on the way. God bless you for writing this talented, moving story...and sharing it with us.
This is WONDERFUL! A very well deserved win. CONGRATULATIONS! I couldn't stop reading. I am SO SO glad the child asked for help at the end.

So beautifully told, I had knots in my throat. And you ended at just the right place.
Congratulations on powerful writing rewarded!
09/07/07
Congratulations on your EC. This is strong writing. Your descriptive phrasing is very good. Nice job with a tough subject.
09/11/07
Wow. What an entry. I was left feeling outraged by the opening paragraphs. And I could smell the mint and roses by the end! I think that one thing that makes the article work is the simplicity of the language. Verbs are carefully chosen, adjectives and adverbs are delicately scattered, giving the piece a lightness that speaks poignantly of hope in the midst of adversity.
09/10/08
This story touched me. I'm glad in the end the MC reached out for the help she needed. Good job.