The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 1043 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
You made us feel so clearly the young man's anger, as well as his regret. Your piece is an excellent reminder for us to be careful at all times of our Christian witness.
08/09/07
Oh, so true — if you are going advertise that you're a believer (as we all should) you'd better be living like one. One little thing that struck me: "I finally finished overhauling my mustang, and now I was taking it to town for a job interview." I chuckled at this, cause it made me think the mustang was going to be interviewed for the job. Minor correction. Good work.
Ouch! I cringed when I realized what happened. Good job showing one negative side of our anger. The writing is superb. Great job.
This piece convicted me. I'm better than I used to be, but there are times when I still feel impatient behind the wheel. I like the twist. Nicely done.
08/13/07
Ouch! Man that hit too close to home. This pulls the reader into getting caught up in the man's anger and then dumps a bucket of regret and shame on them. Excellent ride. But more importantly, it is an excellent message. Good job!
08/13/07
Oooh, ouch! The bumper sticker was a real kick in the stomach. Great writing.

A minor detail: capitalize brand names (like "Mustang"); for a moment, I thought it was a horse.

The pacing of this piece was perfect...the building rage, the shamed resolution. Every word precisely right.
08/13/07
I love stories with a steady crescendo and then a punch. Yours had it all. Great work! Powerful conviction! Well done! :)
You held my interest throughout the piece. Very good lesson to be learned. Excellent writing.
08/13/07
I rarely have road rage hit me, but your description of it made me feel like you were watching me! Very good message and a powerful punch line at the end.
08/13/07
Been there, and I'm glad I learned to get over it. You described road rage to a T. Love the ending and the message.
08/14/07
A good reminder that we do not know who is watching our actions, especially in moments of anger.
08/14/07
Excellent description - and a way too convicting message! I gasped at the end.
08/14/07
Great lesson. I felt like I was in the car and in church with the man.

Exhilatation tickled my thoughts

Frustration doubted my judgement ... and on!

These standout sentences made the piece! At first I thought they would spell a word, but they didn't. They were very clever, though and contributed to a well written story.
The ending was a surprise ... a good one!

08/14/07
Hmmm. Makes me consider not only how I act when driving, but also when dealing with my kids in the grocery store or how I handle myself when confronted by a rude sales person. Excellent story-telling with a powerful punch at the end. Nice job.
What a vivid reminder that everyone has thier story...if only we weren't so impatient, so in a hurry not to take time to listen.
Well done. You had me through the whole story, waiting to see what would happen next. Very thought provoking story.
08/15/07
I just read this from your brick and am stunned at all it implies on so many levels. We just have to realize that the world is watching, and sometimes we forget who we represent. I am convicted, touched, with the good fear of the Lord in reading this.
You did an excellent job in the telling of this story, and topped it off with a perfect message. Well done!
08/15/07
Not only did your choice of words convey the anger, but the way your worked them into shorter sentences added to the overall feel. Great job. I have to agree--this one packed a punch.
08/15/07
Perfect ending. Very well told, one sentence was missing end puctuation but it's so minor against the great pace and emotions you brought out here.
This shows how we need to learn to control our emotions. This article is a good example of how our witness is ruined by our actions.
I envy the beauty and eleoquence of your writing all of you Masters demonstrate. Beautiful piece.
08/16/07
I could feel chills, as the pastor mentioned the bumper sticker's message. It's so true that we need to practise what we preach! This was very well portrayed.