The Official Writing Challenge
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This is an awesome story. Your reader shares with you your love for the Dad you describe so wonderfully and your anger because of the arrogant nurse,determined to medicate him.
08/09/07
I can't help but wonder how many others have had similar experiences. Sometimes anger is justified, and this is a good instance of it. Well written.
Very well written story. I was angry along with the MC!
08/10/07
My fear is that the message in your story is all too true in many cases. The anger is justified. Excellent writing and important message.
08/10/07
Very good story! This raises some good points about our society's hurry to medicate over any problem. Definately a case of anger in the right place. Well done!
Great story. I was ready to punch that nurse through the screen. Nice job.
08/10/07
Great job; your dialogue had me feeling the emotions right along with you. Nicely constructed story.
The nurse made me angry. Good writing!
08/13/07
Wow--if the idea was to elicit anger in your readers, you sure did the trick! Grrrrrrrrrrrrrr! That woman needs to be fired! Great writing, Dee!
08/13/07
Good writing. You had me right in the nursing home with you -- and angry, too. Good job with the topic.
I like the tenderness between father and daughter expressed in this story. I would like to know the outcome of the next fight. Great writing.
08/14/07
Wow. (I am so angry at the nurse right now.) Ufortunately this is so true and sad. The description of the father, daughter relationship was perfect. Great article.
08/14/07
Oh, you got me fuming! Excellent characterization especially. Wonderful stuff.
Your emotions are so toned that the reader can feel everything...the love of the father and daughter, the anger at the nurse and the institution. It also shows the strength of the MC and her willingess to once again to take up the banner and fight for the good fight. Wonderful job.
08/14/07
This is fantastic, Dee!! Your characterizations are excellent and very touching--I could feel the love for Dad and the anger at the nurse enough to want to do something drastic. Excellent job!!
Having gone through Alzheimers with my grandmother, grandfather and mother, this aricle made me cry. Please pray about having this published in a journal or a magazine serching for topics on this subject. It's a needed insight! I have no critique ... it's publishable!
I spend lots of time with my parents in the nursing home, not with alzheimers, though. But I understand that fighting for your parent. I agree with Leigh. Please seek to have this published. This hits a raw nerve with readers. It's excellent.
08/15/07
Powerfully moving. Even mad me mad. Wonderful writing.
Oh my goodness did this cause me to seethe with "righteous anger". I could sadly relate to this so much as my dad did have altzheimers and we had some major problems with a ward he was staying in. Very moving hon. Right on the money here for sure! WOW!Great job!! I would love to see this followed up with another chapter. This is definately publishable material and will speak volumes to the readers. Thx for writing this hon. Janice
This made me angry AND sad. Your story, to me, was effective because we only ever saw the stable dad, just as perhaps the mean nurse only came around when he was being stubborn. On closer inspection, we can see that maybe it's not so cut-and-dried after all.

Excellent writing as always!!
I think you got us all on our soapbox with this one, Dee! It really makes me angry when the very old or very young, our most vulnerable are treated with contempt. I especially loved the spark you preserved when how you had the dad's human spirit fighting to emerge from the dense fog of medication. Also the close that indicated the heroine was not about to give over!! Great job~
08/16/07
Dee, you've written another amazing piece. Wow. Touching and sad.
Yes, this is enough to make one angry. Well written.
08/20/07
Dee I sent you pm and didn't hear from you so maybe you don't have pm. Anyway, just wanted to say I could relate to this because my father was in one of those places not far from you and it's very hard to forget. Be blessed.
08/23/07
Dee, this entry was perfect for the topic. I got so ANGRY just reading it. I don't know whether this is a true story, but how dare they! And how could someone who is supposed to take care of him be so smug watching him like that? Good job making the scene and the characters real.
08/24/07
It had me seething, too. Shows you have the knack of carrying the readers along on the emotional waves and drawing them right into the story. Raises awareness on important issues about the treatment of our precious elderly. Well done.