The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 1155 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
08/09/07
Very well written. I couldn't help but be reminded of the 'Boo Radley' subplot in 'To Kill a Mockingbird' as I read this. I particularly liked Jake's change of heart.
I enjoyed this story and like the turn-around in attitude. You make an excellent point.
This was a fun read, and it too reminded me of 'To Kill a Mockingbird.' I love how at the end, the boys jump in to help without a mind to what Jake might say; that's great.

There's a part in the middle where it sounds as though you shift from first to third person; and I never really got a sense of who the MC was (could have been Carson, really).

Otherwise, though, great job. :-)
I thought the characterization, plot, and descriptions were excellent. The message was presented well with the boys' change of heart.
08/10/07
I'll bet there is going to be one less angry old man in town when the kids get finished (not to mention kids who think before they act). Nice work.
I liked your title link to the subject. I enjoyed reading your story.
I liked this story very much. Carson came through as a strong and exemplary character. I could visualise the scenes very well from your descriptive dialogue. Good work!
08/12/07
Good job!
I really liked this story. And it's not just because my new son is named CARSON!!! (Though that did help.) This has great writing and is a great story. Some people who seem angry, may be angry for a reason. The title is great also.
08/23/07
This also reminds me of Boo Radley. I like the way Carson doesn't back down when the boys don't want him to go to the house. I was a bit confused at first with the shift in POV, but it didn't keep me from enjoying the story!
10/18/07
Bonnie, you not only had a solid story here, but you made the characters come to life. I like the way you handled it.