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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: Embarrassed (07/19/07)

TITLE: Plainly Seen
By Glorey Wooldridge


Ann picked up the phone on the second ring and rhymed off the company greeting. She transferred the call and reached down to roll up her khakis another layer. She silently wished she wasn't the only woman in an office of fifteen men. “Shorts would have been much more comfortable on a hot day like this.” She murmured.

The salesman sitting in the desk across from her (who was wearing shorts) had been watching her closely over the past few weeks. Ann caught him glancing over from time to time and start to say something, only to stop. “What's going on with him?” She wondered.

He was doing it again. She looked at him and decided to get to the bottom of the matter. With irritation in her voice, she stared at him and said, “What?”
He looked at her, glanced at the doorway as if making sure there was no one else around, and spoke. “You're not one of those born againers are you?”

Anne felt as if the wind had been knocked out of her. It was obvious some of her actions had changed over the past few months. Ever since the night she went to a tent meeting in the parking lot of a local store. She hadn't told anyone she had gone, but when the preacher asked if there was someone who would like to ask Jesus into their heart, she found herself moving to the front. God knew the way she was living wasn't working. She had been married three years and was considering giving up.

She wasn't happy and she figured her husband wasn't either. Her parents had divorced when she was a teen and she figured she soon would be too. Now her attitude was changing as she realized God expected marriage to last. Forever. What had been a mediocre attempt to interact with her husband was in the process of becoming a best effort. The results were starting to show. How could she explain faith when she didn't yet understand it herself?

“No!” She heard herself replying quickly. Of course, she had to lie. She could expect to be humiliated and embarrassed if her coworkers knew what was happening in her personal life. She would never hear the end of it. What she didn't expect was the immediate, gut wrenching feeling of sorrow that followed her denial.

She looked down at her feet and was surprised to see leather sandals instead of the loafers she had put on that morning. She heard shouting and the braying and snorting of donkeys. Donkeys? She looked around and realized that the office she had been standing in only moments before had disappeared.

There was dust everywhere. The air around her seem charged with electricity. She heard the crow of a rooster and plainly saw one man stare at another. They were set apart as if they were the only two people in the town, although Ann somehow knew they were not. The noise of the bird seemed to get their attention and one of the men started to wail. His face crumpled as he put his head in his hands and cried. He ran past her sobbing and tripping over his garment. “Wait, wait.” Yelled a voice behind him. Ann watched a woman run after him shouting “You are the man I saw with Jesus. Stop!”

Ann was not sure what all this meant but she figured it had to do with the conversation she had just had. “Oh God, what have I done?” She whispered.
Her vision cleared and she saw that her coworker had walked away from their shared area.
Ann sat down and wondered at what had just happened.

That night she opened the Bible her mother had given her along with a new book. She had stopped at the Christian bookstore on the way home and picked up a concordance. “You look up a word and the reference for the verse should be listed.” The owner told her. Hmmm. Where to start? She looked up the most obvious word, “rooster” and sure enough, there it was. Mark 14:72

She was amazed to read the account of Peter. Peter – the apostle who was so faithful to the Lord. He denied Jesus, just like she had. Now she understood the gravity of what she had done. Tears pooled in her eyes as she slid to her knees to ask for forgiveness and for the strength to set the record straight.

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This article has been read 747 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Verna Cole Mitchell 07/26/07
This is a very well told story with a wonderful message.
Rita Garcia07/26/07
Love the way you gave life to this fantastic message.

Dee Yoder 07/26/07
I like the "vision" the main character experienced, and the message that became clear to her as a result of it. Great descriptions.
Phyllis Inniss07/27/07
Wonderful transition from the present to the very distant past. Your message was well interwoven in your delivery.
Phyllis Inniss07/27/07
What a story teller you are. You must get this into a children's book somehow. It just needs a wider readership.
Phyllis Inniss07/27/07
Sorry, the second comment of mine was meant for the following article. How it got under yours is a mystery to me.
Virginia Gorg07/27/07
This is a well done telling. I like the drifting into the past and the rolled-up khakis. :)
william price07/27/07
Very nice story. A little telly and lots of gray that could have been broke up. But you ministered your point well. And the twist with the vision was way kool. Good job. God bless.
Sharlyn Guthrie07/30/07
It was creative, weaving the story of Peter into this present-day tale. Nice job!
Joanne Sher 07/30/07
Very creative - love her little "vision". Convicting too.
Kristen Hester07/31/07
This is very good. The story flowed into the past wonderfully and without confusion. Good job. I do have one suggestion: I know the story of the roster crowing three times when Peter denies, but the reader may not. I would try to explain that a little more and not count on the reader to look up the verse.
Kristen Hester07/31/07
Opps! You know I mean rooster, not roster.
Lynda Schultz 07/31/07
Good story and a great lesson.
Jan Ackerson 07/31/07
Very good rendering of what a new Christian might go through, and a "flashback" was seamless. Good job.