The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
07/19/07
I love stories about the end times. Scary, but makes one wonder how we will hold up under the pressure. I pray as well as Lissette and her family. You nailed the topic in a creative manner with usual well written cahracterization and subtlety. one of my favorite as I read through some entries this morning!
07/19/07
Ooh, this story is good! Makes me think about the choices our country is making now-how are we "helping" to usher in the kind of world described in your story? Good thing we know Who holds the future!
07/20/07
Excellent detail - you certainly have a way with setting the scene and showing. Much to think about here.
07/21/07
This thought-provoking end-times story is excellently written, the message shown clearly.
07/22/07
Chilling, provocative, moving... I want 75,000 words!
07/23/07
Captivating. I love the POV. Your experiment worked. I want more, more, more!
07/23/07
I love the way the MC views her friends happiness more than shares in it. The scar will serve as an even bigger reminder in days to come. I agree, I would love to read the expanded version.
07/23/07
Wow, this one is really, really good... Powerful message!
07/23/07
Wow! This was so interesting. The fact that you wrote this from the perspective of a person who was sympathetic toward the main character gave your story an interesting twist. I also liked how you repeated, "How can she be so happy," and then ended with a question along the lines of "Will she still be so happy?"
07/23/07
I absolutely love this. Creative foction, yet chillingly realistic. The POV was perfect, the storytelling nothing short of masterful. :-)
07/24/07
You hit the Scriptural / philosophical Happy Theme right on the head with this piece, showing happiness to be available from within instead of environmentally controlled. The view of the protagonist being so removed created a tone that worked great with the plot.
07/24/07
Excellent writing! I love this masterful story of true happiness. Well Done!!
07/25/07
I would've liked to read more on this. The setting, everything was just great. I liked how you used the memory of the scar throughout the story. My fave part was the last line. I think Lisette would still be happy. She has a true happiness that maybe one day her friend will see. ^_^ Great job!
07/25/07
You painted a beautiful portrait in words and told a masterful story. The voice, the pace, the meterm the tone all so well done. And odd as it might seem, I can see myself at times on either side of the two stories.
07/25/07
This has a realistic feeling. Sad but possibly true someday. But I like the happiness portrayed here.
07/25/07
A perfect 10!! OH MY...... I'm not going to be able to sleep tonight. You sure outdid yourself on this story! Sequel, please!

PS I couldn't stop laughing when I read the line about holding the doll hostage.
07/26/07
Wow. This made my skin crawl because it feels like this government is just around the corner. I love the way you tell a story.

More importantly, it made me look at myself. Why do I let life's little annoyances keep me from being happy?

You are masterful at bringing the subtle message out loud and clear. Great job.