The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 929 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
07/21/07
Really enjoyed the picturesque description and gentle walking pace of your story of a walk. Thought it very beautiful. Would love to have known more of what you were thinking as you walk. Also would have found the last sentence more satisfying if it had given more insight into what you finally thought. A rather tame ending to such a promising and fulfilling walk and story. A little r5ewrite with some personal aspect would make it perfect for me.
07/21/07
Thank you for painting a picture in words of Jerusalem.