Hire
Writers
Editors
Home Tour About Read What's New Help Forums Join
My Account Login
Shop
Save
Support
E
Book
Store
Learn
About
Jesus
  



The HOME for Christian writers! The Home for Christian Writers!
The Official Writing Challenge

BACK TO
CHALLENGE
MAIN

INSTRUCTIONS

how it works
submission rules
guidelines for
choosing a level

ENTRIES

submit your entry
read current entries
read past entries
challenge winners



Our Daily Devotional HERE
Place it on your site or
receive it daily by email.





TRUST JESUS TODAY

TRY THE TEST



Share
how it works   Submit

Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: Confident (07/05/07)

TITLE: Two for One Special
By Patty Wysong
07/09/07


 LEAVE COMMENT ON ARTICLE
 SEND A PRIVATE COMMENT
 ADD TO MY FAVORITES

Ashley was lying on the ground gasping for breath when a taunting face came into focus right above her. She blinked her eyes, desperately hoping that he would leave her alone, but knowing she was in for it.

“And that’s what you call a ‘Two for One Special.’” Joe glared down at her before hauling her to her feet. “How many times have I told you to do it like you mean it?”

“How can I do it like I mean it when I don’t even know how to do it the right way?” Ashley demanded. “Sir,” she added as an afterthought, so as not to appear disrespectful.

“Ashley, you know how to do this throw. I taught you myself and I’ve seen you do it, so just toss that thought right outta your head,” Joe said. “If that’s how you’re going to defend yourself against some punk boy then that’s where you’re gonna end up. On your back.”

Ashley’s eyes opened wide; he’d never talked to her like that. Joe opened his mouth to say more but snapped it closed as he looked around at the younger children in the karate class who were watching and listening.

Pulling Ashley over to the side he snagged Daniel, another black belt. “Watch closely,” Joe told them.

Joe moved off several paces, bowed and executed a black belt kata.* When he finished he planted himself in front of her.

“Well, what did you think of it?” he asked her.

“It looked great to me,” Ashley hedged.

“Why?”

“Sharp, crisp movements.”

“Huh.” Joe grunted. “Daniel, what did you think of it?”

Daniel laughed. “What in the world was that?”

“That was Nai Hanchi.** Didn’t you recognize it?”

“You mean parts of it were Nai Hanchi,** the rest was Pinan Go Dan.” **

“So, I screwed it up?”

“Majorly,” Daniel replied.

“Why couldn’t Ashley tell?”

“You bluffed so convincingly that she believed you.”

“That’s right. I acted confident and I was able to convince her.” Joe looked meaningfully at Ashley. “That’s what you need to do.”

Ashley looked confused so Joe softened his voice. “Sweetheart, when you act confidently others believe you, even if you don’t feel confident.”

Daniel looked at her seriously. “If you’re on a date and the guy starts to do stuff you don’t want to do and you hesitantly tell him to stop, he won’t listen to you. He might stop for a minute or two, but it won’t be long before he’s back at it. He’ll hear your hesitancy and go off that. But if you confidently tell him to stop he’s more likely to listen to you. If he doesn’t, you have the knowledge and the skill to put a stop to it and to get away from him. You have to act confidently. That’s what Joe’s trying to get through to you.”

“You saw how fast you went down when you were supposed to be throwing me. You weren’t confident in your actions. Even if you didn’t know what you were doing, but had been acting confidently, I wouldn’t have been able to throw you as easily,” Joe explained.

“People are far less likely to attack a person who looks, and acts, confident,” Daniel added.

Act confident, even when you’re not, and eventually you’ll feel confident, too.” Joe smiled at Ashley’s look of surprise. “And others will see you as a confident person, and treat you as one, too.”

“It’s that way in most areas of life.” Daniel chuckled. “You ought to try it. It works.”

******

A week later Ashley strutted into karate and Daniel nudged Joe. “She’s strutting this week.”

“How’d the date go, Ashley?” Joe asked.

Ashley’s mouth dropped open. “How’d you know about my date?”

“I knew about it last week, before you went on it. How’d it go?” Joe crossed his arms over his chest.

She grinned ruefully. “Well, let’s just say that acting confident sure did help.”

“Are you going out with him again?”

“No way.” She was emphatic.

Daniel chuckled. “So, why are you strutting?” he asked as Joe relaxed and smiled.

Ashley took a playful swipe at him. “Because there’s a huge difference between confidence and arrogance. I can be confident without being arrogant so I’m practicing my confidence by walking confidently.”

“Is it working?”

“Of course it is. That was quite a ‘Two for One Special,’” she smiled. “Thanks.”




*kata—routines martial artists use as practice
**Names of black belt katas


The opinions expressed by authors may not necessarily reflect the opinion of FaithWriters.com.
Accept Jesus as Your Lord and Savior Right Now - CLICK HERE
JOIN US at FaithWriters for Free. Grow as a Writer and Spread the Gospel.


This article has been read 776 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Joanne Sher 07/12/07
Excellent message, told in such an engaging manner! I love this example, and the interaction among the characters.
Dee Yoder 07/13/07
Good message, good story, good writing! I loved reading this!
terri tiffany07/13/07
Good point here! Nice writing - I thought I saw a POV shift one place towards the end but I could be wrong.Otherwise - very creative - could be a good published story for teens.
Jan Ackerson 07/15/07
Very good--there's definitely an audience for this piece. Share it with your youth group, for sure.
Kevin Rodgers07/15/07
Very good writing here. I could learn a lot from you by the great dialog you have shown between the characters. Keep up the good work!
Sara Harricharan 07/17/07
Love this! I like the martial arts terms and atmosphere, and especially how it you surprised me in the beginning, I wasn't quite sure where you were going with it. I liked the dialouge especially, very realistic, good characters. Great writing! ^_^
Terry R A Eissfeldt 07/17/07
Great object lesson - this could be a skit with the right people of course - who know what they're doing!
Loved it
Joy Faire Stewart07/17/07

I don't know anything about this sport, but you made it very interesting. Right on target for topic.
Sharlyn Guthrie07/17/07
You made some great applications here. This would be an excellent story for teenagers. Well done.
Loren T. Lowery07/17/07
I was just reading where people will not follow someone who is trying to lead unless they show confidence. Your story supports this and I enjoyed the way you were able to bring this out in the martial arts arena. Sounds like something you are familiar with because you did a good job - confidently in fact!
Kristen Hester07/17/07
You go, girl! I love this message. A lack of Confidence is what gets many girls in trouble. This is a great, important message.
Verna Cole Mitchell 07/18/07
"Act confidently to show confidence." You "showed" it just right in this story.
Benjamin Graber07/18/07
This was an enjoyable read with a good message as well... Good job.
dub W07/18/07
I liked this, good moral in the dialogue, great advice for everyone.
Jacquelyn Horne07/18/07
Good article on using confidence as a defense and how to accomplish being confident.
Catrina Bradley 07/19/07
At the beginning, I thought this was going to be about domestic violence, but you took me in a totally unexpected direction. I wasn't sure about the message at first (act confident and you'll become confident) mainly because I'm not a confident person. You convinced me by the end, so you did you your job well. Great entry - congrats on your 22nd and 8th places!!!
Esther Gellert07/20/07
Great story Peej. It left me wishing I knew some teenage girls I could share it with.