The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
05/31/07
Excellent, excellent description. BUT, you can't
leave me hanging! You have to expand this. Well done.
05/31/07
Wow -great intensity and descriptions... but I want to see him get what's coming to him!
05/31/07
Very intense. Great job!
05/31/07
Amazingly visual and descriptive - I was on the edge of my seat from beginning to end! Excellent.
05/31/07
Very visual.
06/03/07
Intense, the dialect highlighted the story and added a realistic tone. Well done.
06/03/07
Awesome suspense! Excellent story.
06/04/07
Wow! Intense - definitely. Frightening. Excellent description. And as noted above - a cliffhanger. Great job!
06/04/07
Gripping! I could see, hear, feel, smell everything. The ending was like a punch in the stomach, and really brought truth to your title.
06/04/07
Wow - Vivid - rivoting - intense - just a few adjectives I would use to describe this story. I liked the line "fallen branches matched the snap of each nerve" and the "cold melevolence" Excellent descriptions with a great ending!You did well with putting us in the action and in her emotions:)
06/04/07
I love the line - "Dying would have to wait" - it screams defiance to all the forces that would drag us down.

Thanks, and God bless,

Kevin
06/06/07
Wow, intense but gripping story. Another great story for the challenge!
06/06/07
I wanted more! I hated that it had to end. I really enjoyed it.
06/06/07
Whoa! This is some adventure. It sort of slows, the little bit with Coot, but then it picks up right away and leaves us hanging. Good job. Not too dark. I like the stammering edge and the last thought of "Dying would have to wait." Excellent descriptions, very powerful. ^_^
06/06/07
Very well done. Just a little too short. Needed to know more........word count blues.
06/06/07
Wow! What a suspenseful, tragic story! Your descriptions were excellent, and I liked the courage the MC showed. Great last line! :)
06/06/07
I liked the bravado of the MC - you could not help but root for her. I'm not sure if I would have thought of this as an adventure as much as an example of courage and zest for life no matter the tragedies we encounter.
06/06/07
Oh, my goodness, Pat! I'm so glad you decided to throw a brick! I wouldn't have wanted to miss this one. I absolutely loved it. It was certainly and adventure in my book! The writing was flawless.
06/07/07
This is my kind of adventure! Great writing!
06/07/07
Gee Pat - bravo for you! You sure know how to keep us all biting our nails! This was very well done, and I liked the way you didn't have any long paragraphs. The short clips (one or two sentences) were very effective in producing drama as I read this.

Woo hoo to you!
06/08/07
It's great the way you jump straight into the story and into the psyche of your MC. Appeals to all the sences. Fast paced and rivetting. I do think, though, that 'companionable silence' has become a cliche. yeggy