The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
05/31/07
A story that kept my attention... I could really relate to the emotional journey of the storyteller. Great descriptions!
Very interesting and well written story...excellent lesson too.
06/01/07
Great message in this story! My favorite line was "We don’t always know what lies ahead – because if we did - we probably wouldn’t try anything.” How true! Good job! :)
Very good. Making a harrowing experience into a good POV.
06/04/07
Amazing storytelling! You held my attention throughout with the vivid descriptions and harrowing details. Very well written!
This kept me on the edge of my seat for a bit. I felt like I was there.Great descritions and comparisons. I could relate to this as I have sometimes complained myself in life. I 've often wondered, "What are we doing in a situation like this?", when all the time God was there designing the whole episode and guiding us through the rivers of His planned adventure. I really like your writing style. Wow.God bless your gifts hon.Janice
06/04/07
Wow! This gave me chills! I loved it! The whole story and how it all tied together for a life lesson and at the same time kept me on the edge of my seat.

I really hope this does well - it should.
Great piece of writing. I really liked the beginning in italics, seemed to set up anticipation for the story. Good job!